Found
by DMartinez
Summary: Sequel to Lost. Claire left John for good and had to make her own way. Takes place between the last two chapters of Lost.
1. Chapter 1

Author: DMartinez  
Email: dmarttx  
Disclaimer: Characters belong to Kripke and the WB, CW. No infringement intended.  
Rating: R  
Category: Supernatural; Caleb/Claire  
Summary: Sequel to Lost. Claire left John for good and had to make her own way.

* * *

Prologue

Night time. Lonely time. Caleb Bailey hated the night. Bad things happened at night. The last decade had been a blur but he remembered the lonely nights. He'd filled them with booze-laced coffee, books on lore and weapons maintenance. The more obscure the lore, the better. The stronger the coffee, the better. The bigger the bang, the better. Not tonight.

Tonight, he wasn't alone. He was lonely, still but he couldn't do any of the other things that filled his nights. Tonight had been about booze and sex. He sat on his side of her bed, still sipping whiskey and she was snoring softly. Some girl with dark hair and small tits. He had to keep himself awake. He didn't sleep in other people's beds.

Darkness was everywhere. Outside where the wind whipped by. Outside where the shadows were deep and the hours still long. In every city, in every small hamlet. He beat it back with knives and guns and booze. He spoke the words in languages that no one cared to learn anymore. He read each word until it was burned into his brain for later use. Books from all over the world. Paid for in blood and guns. The bigger the bang, the bigger the buck, the harder the price, the higher the price.

Somewhere, in some detective's mind, Caleb was the monster in the closet. Caleb had his own monsters. Possessed folk. He knew incantations in 14 languages and he was happy to teach them to anyone who asked. He whispered one, a short one, just in case. The brunette didn't budge. Good sign.

An hour later when she woke, she smiled up at him. Her eyes were brown. She ran her hand up his thigh and it was a way to kill the rest of the night. Watching her small tits bouncing, releasing his frustrations and pretending to sleep while she got washed up and answered the phone. It was early but some people had regular jobs, complete with carpools.

"He's alright. Quiet." She whispered into her phone, the water running but not quite enough to cover her voice. The room had already turned to pinks and oranges. She laughed. "That… was… QUITE satisfactory. He's asleep for now but I'll have to kick him out before you get here… He's got this… gap between his teeth and you know I hate that but when he smiles… Ooh… I want to lick it."

And up he was. He was hunting for his shirt when she came skidding out of the bathroom with her toothbrush hanging out of her mouth. "I'll be out of your hair in a few minutes."

"I have to go to work."

He motioned that it was fine. He couldn't remember her name anyway. He slipped out before she finished brushing her teeth. All the way home, he saw shadows shrinking. People waking up who had no clue what happened at night. All he saw when he saw them was his lost innocence. 19 years old when he went looking for answers and came back with knowledge of the darkness. Once a person knew about the darkness, there was nothing else. Even in the light of a bright shining sun.

When he got home, he stared up at the house for a long moment but all he saw was her face. Her beautiful face, cut and bleeding and her dead eyes staring back at him. His love had died alone. Had been brutalized by a monster wearing human skin. He unlocked his door, ignored the flashing light on his answering machine and gone to bed for his usual four hours of sleep.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 1

* * *

He was on his porch, smoking his way through a pack of cigarettes when the truck pulled in. Caleb could only grin. Only Winchester would show up, unannounced, to a place where he owed money. And bring guests. He mentally checked his inventory and his fridge before bounding out to greet the man. If there was one thing that Winchester was good for, it was filling the nighttime hours with things that made him forget her face, if just for a few hours. "Winchester! You son of a bitch, it's been forever!"

"I know it." John nodded and turned to help someone out of the truck. "I need your help."

Caleb set eyes on the woman and instinct kicked in. "Please tell me you need to relieve yourself of that hot blonde."

Pissed. Blonde with spit fire. She reached for the truck and John yanked her back to his side and shut the door. "He's just jokin', darlin'."

"I might not be." Caleb ran his eyes over her. Long legs, curves in the right places and a gun tucked into her jacket. He definitely wasn't kidding. He tore his eyes away to look at the truck. Caleb would know that bag of drool anywhere. "That Dean in there?"

"Yep… Let's leave him for a minute. I got a story to tell you and it's easier to tell when he can't do any talking." John had his fingers looped through the woman's belt loops. She looked like she wanted to bolt at any moment.

Caleb led them into the house and passed out beer. Pixies. His mind ran through his books while John talked. The blonde was quiet, peering out the window behind Caleb every now and again. Darlene, though John mostly called her Darlin'. She rolled her eyes every time. It was amusing. She caught him watching her drink her beer and gave him the dirtiest look that he'd gotten in a long time. He just smiled back and wagged his eyebrows at her. Then John got to the really important part. Dean, the amnesiac, was tail-spinning. "Dean? Tail-spinning?" Caleb took a breath and used the walk to the fridge to think about what that would look like. He could never remember the kid being so much as nervous before. Tail spinning? "That don't seem like him."

"He's got no memory of being a hunter. He's learned all over again but lucky for him the tools were all at his disposal." John took a breath. "He's determined to solve it. I need help with him. I can't…" John's eyes slid to Darlene. She looked back. They had the same expressions on their faces. "She just wants to forget what happened and Dean can't let it go. If the numbers are right… I killed one. Dean killed another but there are two out there in those woods. Dean and Darlene got lucky but after what happened in there, they're still here. Maybe minus some communications skills but we've been working around it."

Caleb ran a hand over his head and for the first time in many years wished that he had a head of hair like John Winchester. The skin seemed offensive in front of such… He cut the thought off and forced his mind to the matter at hand. Why he was lingering on the woman was strange. Especially when she was so repulsed. Why hadn't he tried Rogaine? "So, she's mute but hears fine. He's deaf but talks fine."

"Yeah." John's hand fell on her knee. It didn't mean anything. People did that. It was comforting.

"Well, I got some space. I got a lot of books. I don't know if I got anything on pixies." Caleb ran his mind over the last bunch of books he had and if he had any from long ago that he hadn't read through enough. He looked through the window at the truck where Dean was still sleeping. "I can't imagine Dean spiraling. Let's go bring him in." He got to his feet, trying not to stare at John's hand on her knee. "How do you… I mean, if he can't hear?"

"They both sign." John shrugged and Caleb saw the annoyance when Darlene's elbow slammed into John's gut.

The jealousy flared. He almost laughed. He was jealous of an old man with creaky knees and a bad liver. Darlene wasn't really his type, anyway. Still, he wanted her enough, he wasn't afraid to be himself in front of John. "Oh… I see. She's taken."

John's eyes flashed something at Caleb. Regret. An apology. Something that Caleb didn't want to see. He bounded outside and had to catch his breath. He hadn't reacted this way to just seeing a woman since he was a teenager. She was John's and she was beautiful and had the good sense to be fed up with Caleb's stares and comments. He never usually felt bad for ogling women. Some even enjoyed it. This one kept her eyes on her beer bottle or on John. Maybe that's what it was. This one didn't want him.

Caleb clapped his hands on the side of the truck. That didn't work, so he opened the door and Dean almost fell out. The kid startled away and pulled a knife. Caleb held his hands up and smiled. Nothing. No recognition. That made him sad. He and Dean usually had good times together. Caleb forced himself to be deliberate. He got Dean in the house. He was as easygoing as the Dean he knew once he realized Caleb was a friend.

Dean got his project set up and talked the whole time. They got a routine going. Dean talked to the room. When the room wanted to talk to Dean, Darlene signed to Dean. They clashed with Caleb's precise style in studying but Dean had the right bead going. Darlene didn't like Caleb's manner. It made him want her more. Caleb asked the hard questions and got her ire for it. He got enough to get a tangent going on his own. Sam had set him up with some new software on his way out west but he didn't mention it in front of John.

Caleb scanned all of Dean's research on missing folks. The software did its work. They found the pattern. He stared at the pictures but he couldn't put his finger on it. Then Darlene, filled with energy, began running around the room, gesturing. Blonde hair, green eyes. They were key to this thing. Fuckin' pixies. Then she was gone. They could hear her puke. "You knock her up, John?"

"Fuck you." John followed her outside.

Caleb watched them through the window for a bit and got back to work on Dean's mystery. He watched her when he could. She took care of everyone. Fixing dinner from stuff Caleb had left out. Shushing Dean when he got too loud. Finishing John's beer so he didn't get too drunk. Caleb liked her. She made it clear that he disgusted her and Caleb found he liked it that way.

Caleb left John alone with his computer. He watched the older man hunt and peck for a moment before going out to join Dean in his research. Caleb found the books that Dean needed and gave a summary of things he knew. The Tuatha de Danaan were the real deal. Pixies. Real Pixies. Beings from another place or dimension. They got into the metaphysics and the lore. Dean frowned as he tried to follow Darlene's hands. She had him open books for her so she could have context. Dean read over her shoulder. She seemed to be comfortable with Dean's proximity but the second Caleb got within two feet, her eyes turned murderous and she was storming away with her books. So Caleb did it to make her silently harrumph and storm away again and again. Dean was so caught up in his studies that he didn't notice.

In the mid-morning, Darlene had emerged from the bedroom she shared with John in such a state that Caleb had to catch his breath. When he saw her, he put her aside, firmly. The hair, the skirt, the pearls. She was… not meant for their world. She should be someplace where they served brunch and cocktails and had doormen and people who emptied ashtrays when no one was looking.

Caleb wanted to throw her down and have his way with her but instead, he whistled and she cut him to the quick with a look. She glanced around the room and crossed her arms. She breathed out harshly. She made a motion with her hands. Caleb had learned that one well enough. _Where's John?_

"Still in there." Caleb motioned to the study where John had been cooped up with the computer. "I'd say he was looking up porn but I wouldn't bother with that shit if I had you in my bed at night."

She signed something that made Dean laugh. She stormed into the kitchen for coffee. Dean turned to Caleb. "You really get under her skin."

"Oh yeah? You think she wants me?"

Dean squinted at Caleb's lips. Caleb repeated the question and waggled his eyebrows for emphasis. Dean laughed. "Dude… Look at me. I'm hot. She still fucks the old man."

"You telling me that I don't have a shot?"

Dean stared at Caleb. "I don't remember you, dude. I'm trying."

"I'm not going to steal her." Caleb backed up. "I got high hopes."

Dean laughed and lowered his gaze to his knees. "So does she."

Caleb tapped his shoulder so he would look up again. "What's that?"

"Try watching him instead of her." Dean returned to his wall. Darlene returned with the coffee pot and refilled all their cups. Refreshed, she started signing for Dean again. They had just started having a good time when John came out of the study with his little stack of paper and turned Darlene's world upside down. Caleb caught John up on what they had been discussing prior to his entrance. Caleb watched John. He kept his eyes on Dean and on the information at hand and Caleb's vision kept wandering to the door. Finally, he had to ask. "Your girl gonna be alright?"

"Yeah. She's made of the strong stuff." John only nodded and didn't make a move to the door until the next evening.

* * *

John disappeared to take care of Darlene, or Claire, and Caleb took care of Dean while they sorted out this Pixie mess. John eventually came back out with Dean's car and took off in the truck. Caleb's seething and drinking were kept to a minimum. It was just like John to ask for help and then bail when the hard part came. Then Caleb made himself pause. No. John would be there for the hunt. The prep stuff sometimes bored him and Caleb would probably be more angry if no one was taking care of the girl. The beautiful girl who had lost her memory of her life and her poor dead child and a world without monsters. What Caleb would give to live in a world without monsters…

Caleb did his best to work with Dean. Dean who needed ears more than he needed ideas. The ideas were there. The homework was done. The puzzle just needed fine tuning. They kept a routine and that seemed to calm Dean. Knowing what came next. They read chapters on the Tuatha De Danaan. They read up on iron works. Caleb retaught Dean a few exorcisms and watched the kid write each word down in a journal just like his father did. They got eggs and bacon down for every meal. They cleaned guns and washed the cars. Work and study and work and study. Dean had some cash and paid for some guns. John hadn't given an indication on when he'd return. Could be five minutes or five days or five months. Dean was gearing up to do the hunt himself and Caleb would probably go with if John didn't show up in time.

When they returned, Darlene, as she wanted to be called, was calm and that strength pulled at Caleb, so he bowed out of the hunt, citing better people to do. She'd rolled her eyes at him and started gathering up Dean's research. He helped load up the truck. When he said his goodbyes on the driveway, he'd been himself, the self he'd become since coming into the world of darkness. "Hey John." He tossed him a thumbs up and gestured at Darlene, then whistled. He had to step back at the same time John wrapped an arm around her waist to haul her away. When she was on her way to the truck, glares sent over her shoulder, Caleb shrugged that he couldn't help it. "The woman's hot. Too hot for you. It's fuckin' tragic is what it is."

"You know, Caleb… you're actually a good person. If you acted less like a jackass, maybe you'll get a girl someday." John shook his head at him.

"I get plenty of girls." Caleb grinned bright white and wide, his best imitation of a Winchester grin that he'd seen diminish ladies to a puddle of want. John had just stared at him for a moment before glancing over at his son. "You take care of that one, huh? She seems nice."

When John's gaze hit the ground, he finally saw it. What Dean was talking about. He wanted to haul her out of the truck but knew she wanted to kill those damned Pixies herself. John didn't know what to do with her. Caleb was sure he did plenty with her but was more sure that none of it was his idea.

He rounded the truck to say his goodbyes to Dean. Dean stared at Caleb for a long while. "Are we like… buds?"

"Totally." Caleb nodded. "When you can hear again, swing by. New bar in town Hot chicks."

"I'm in." Dean answered immediately with a grin which seemed to surprise him. He shook his head and kept grinning. "Yeah, I'm in."

Caleb watched the truck back out and then turned to look at his house. He'd bought the house when he was engaged to marry his girl. They had planned to fill it with children. Now it was filled with weapons. It sent him straight into the bottle. She was a pretty face. He didn't know much about her. He did have all his memories of his girl. High school, work. Not many years but a lot of fun while it lasted.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 2

* * *

Gun deals were rote. Caleb did them all the time. Always in broad daylight. It unnerved his colleagues but money talked. The way he moved guns talked. As long as they did what he said, everyone made out like bandits.

Hunts were good to fill time. Poltergeists were simple enough. Like a workout to keep the kinks out. Caleb drove around and if he wasn't hunting, he was inside at night. Jefferson laughed.

"You're still afraid of the dark." Jeff sighed and tossed back his whiskey.

"I'm not afraid of the dark."

"Curtains pulled tight. Lights on."

"You remember what I saw the last time I was outside and it was dark out?" Caleb reminded him.

"She was a pretty girl." Jeff nodded to his glass before rising to refill it. "How do you hunt at night?"

"I do what I have to. In the dark if I have to."

"How do you fuck?"

"Some people are a pleasure to look at while you fuck them. We don't all fuck trolls."

"Fuck you."

"No, fuck you."

They went out the next night to pick up ladies. Caleb got Jeff laid but went back to his room alone. Lights on, he cleaned his guns until sunrise. He napped for four hours and then hit the road.

Then he spent a week with the pastor, conjugating Latin until his eyes crossed. Jim was training with a sword when Caleb crawled out of the library. It was dark out. Jim lowered the sword. "Didn't think you were ever coming out of there."

"Needed a distraction. I haven't been a very good guest. I'll make breakfast before I go to bed."

"Still sleeping in the mornings." Jim nodded

"I'm awake when the evil things are stalking the night."

"As you should be." Jim motioned him over and with a flask, blessed his bald head. "I don't see you enough."

"I would think you see me plenty." They wandered out to put on the big porch light and drink a few beers. "Jefferson is headed this way in about a month."

"Thank you for the warning." Jim laughed. "Last time he and I spoke, he was forbidden to bring his dates here… You haven't left that library or else you'd be under the same mandate."

"Haven't been interested in a while."

"Oh? Is there a woman who took your interest?"

"Lots of women take my interest. They just aren't that interesting for very long. It gets old."

"As do all things… all people…" Jim nodded to his bottle. "Have you given up?"

"Nah… Dean and I are set to go out when he gets his memory back."

"Dean Winchester?" Jim turned fully. "When did you see him?"

"Last month."

"Does John know that you've seen his son?"

"John's the one who brought him out to me.

"He didn't call." Jim crossed himself and made Caleb tell what he knew.

"They've gone off to kill the Pixies that stole from them. Should be dead about now if the research was right."

"You helped?"

"I did."

"Then it'll be right."

"Thanks. I like that someone has confidence in my work."

"We all do. John wouldn't have gone to you if you couldn't help. I'm surprised he didn't drag you along."

Caleb stared at his drink. "I didn't go. I chose not to go."

"Oh?"

Caleb shrugged. "I'll see them some other time."

"We all will."

The subject changed and Caleb got to thinking and drinking his way through two states. He came home to the empty palace and promptly passed out for three days. Lights blaring through the night on a timer.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 3

* * *

He was back in a routine. Reading, training, buying weapons, trading weapons, drinking, sleeping with women with low standards. Some girls just loved a bald head and some gravel on the face. Somebody who reeked of danger. This one was blonde. Okay body, sort of small all over, a palmful where it counted. She slept hard. Caleb didn't mind much. It was better than being alone. Didn't see her face for once when he closed his eyes. When the dark started turned to gray, he got up to get the coffee going. He was on his second cup, third cigarette and wishing dawn lasted a bit longer when she emerged. He got a kiss, surrendered a swallow of coffee and then she was on her way.

Eggs, toast and inventory. Caleb was knee deep in packing foam when he heard the footsteps in his house. Grabbing a blade, he jogged up the stairs. He eased open the door to find a blonde creeping around his kitchen. He guided the door open and leaned in the doorway so he could watch her, knife loosely hanging from his hand. She turned and screamed. He laughed. "I didn't take you for a screamer."

"Shut up."

"Me, shut up… you're in my house."

"You didn't answer when I knocked."

"Just invited yourself in. You've been hanging with those Winchesters too long." He pointed at her with the tip of his blade.

"You're right." She lowered her gaze. "Sorry. Didn't mean to intrude."

"Nonsense. You. You're welcome any time." Caleb grinned at her. "So, you can talk… what are they calling you these days?"

"Claire."

"You look good. Miss me?" Caleb set the knife down and reached for the coffeepot.

"Hardly." She rolled her eyes and moved away, her eyes darting around the room.

"So, to what do I owe the pleasure?"

"John says you know your guns and I need some guns."

"What kind of guns?"

"I got this semi-automatic but I'm new. I know I need… more."

"So, you're gonna be a hunter, huh? That's so fucking hot."

"You're a pig."

"What? Cause I know beauty when I see it?"

"Cause you don't bother to care if a woman is interested."

"Tell me the truth. You got tired of fucking that old man, right?"

"Fuck you." Claire stormed out.

Caleb felt bad as he watched her lean on her car and cry. He got his dinner started and made a salad. He was just setting steaks on the grill when he heard her moving around on the porch. She leaned on the wall and watched him cook for a moment. "You hungry?"

"I don't want to impose."

"Impose. It fills the days." Caleb motioned to the grill. "These are medium rare."

"It's fine. Thank you."

When they were seated at his little table and he was watching her move her salad around, it was too heavy. Caleb got up to get them beer. She took it and downed half in a go, then started actually eating. "You want to talk about it?"

"When I got my voice back, I couldn't stop talking. Dean and I talked for hours and hours…" Claire stared at a tomato hard.

"What about John?"

"He's not much of a talker."

"You're right." Caleb watched her face. "So, who left who?"

"I left but…"

"Ouch." Caleb felt sorry for all the jokes.

"I just figured we… We just worked so well together and…"

"No one works well with John." Caleb offered with a half a smile. "Don't get me wrong… he knows what he's doing. He's a good person to have at your back on a hunt… but uh… He's a bold and intense flavor that you savor when you have it, you talk about it when you don't… and you'd vomit if you had it all the time."

Claire laughed at that.

"You have a beautiful smile. Wish you'd done it more last time you were here." When her face screwed up in a scowl. "These walls never see anything so gorgeous. My bald head does not attract the supermodels."

She sighed and her mouth screwed up so she didn't have to smile. She shoved a huge bite of lettuce in her mouth.

"Did you have a plan when you left him?"

"No." She shook her head. "I figured I'd wander and hunt. I mean. John never seemed to know where he was going."

"You're wrong."

"I was wrong. He knew. He always knew. Those papers. I, uh… came up woefully unprepared for a hunt. I got it done but…"

"You need your own arsenal."

"Yes."

"I'll get you set up."

"Thank you." She licked her lips and sipped her drink. She looked up at him. "I've gotten pulled over a couple of times. John's looking for me, I think. I need new ID. Dean showed me how but I forgot some stuff."

He blinked at that. "Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely."

After dinner, Claire brought her bag in and Caleb put her up in the room Dean had used last instead of the room John had used last. She seemed grateful. After a shower and another beer, she joined him to watch the night on the porch. She tucked her knees up under her chin. "What do you do out here?"

"Stay away from people." Caleb admitted.

"Why?"

"John didn't tell you about me?"

"No."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Ok." Claire stared up at the sky. "So many stars. My kid would have loved this view. Where we lived, there were always street lights and I always thought there were plenty of stars to watch. He would gripe that he couldn't see enough of them."

"Kids. Wow. I couldn't… not with the things I see."

"He was before this madness."

"Weren't you in Bosnia? Didn't that shit cure you of kids?" Caleb looked at her. She smiled and laid her head on her knees again to look at him. "Why would you after seeing that shit?"

"It was a surprise. I didn't plan my Sebastien. He's… what happened when soldiers get together and have too much to drink. I never thought of not having him. Even after I found out my folks had passed. Maybe because they had passed. He was my bit of good in the world." Her eyes filled with water. "You know, no one much missed me when I went missing but they all knew he was gone. They had memorial pages and markers and the whole bit. And they only knew him a few years with park playdates and soccer and kindergarten."

"You still see the joy?"

"Yes, finally. That whole year when I couldn't remember… I felt the sun but I couldn't see it, you know? Now… now that I remember everything, I would never regret having him." She sat up and wiped at her eyes. "One of the reasons that John and I fought… I thought I might be pregnant once. He freaked out even though I wasn't. I wouldn't have minded. Still wouldn't. He can't do it again. Says he's too old."

"He told you about his wife?"

"Bits. Dean told me some. I read some in that journal of his. I understand, I guess."

Caleb laughed suddenly. "If anyone had ever told me that I'd be jealous of John Fucking Winchester…" He tipped his beer back into his mouth. "Lord knows that would never want to lose my wife that way, have to raise two little ones like he did. And in this fucking world…"

"Cause he had me?"

"Cause he found someone who knows what we know and isn't fucking destroyed by it, and doesn't think he's a monster."

"I overheard John talking to a friend of his once." Claire had her eyes on her toes. "He said that John was the Captain Kirk of hunters…"

Caleb didn't say anything for a long time.

"John said that no, Dean was the Captain Kirk of hunters."

Caleb laughed. "Well, I can see that. Dean does get a lot of tail."

"More than you?"

"I wouldn't know. We only see each other once every year or so and just for a long weekend of debauchery but that kid… the ladies like him. He's a good wingman."

"John?"

"He'll get a damsel in distress every now and again. Once, I heard he botched a hunt, got sent to the ER… all fucking gross and bloody, dirty… picked up a nurse. Hot one."

"Blonde?"

"Probably."

"Most likely?" She bit out.

Caleb had forgotten. She wasn't just a girl he wanted. She was a girl who was in John Winchester's thrall. "John's got a type."

"Yeah. I figured." She nodded. "What about you?"

"I don't want to talk about it." He'd had too much to drink for this conversation. It's why he did not date women long term. They knew how to get a man to a weak point and expose and exploit it. His wounds had never been exposed like this before.

"Why? Am I not your type? Is a breathing woman not your type?"

Caleb stood up and stared out into the darkness. It was easier than this. Probably the only reason he was outside, in the dark was that he was too afraid to have a conversation with her in the light. He said her name for the first time in a decade. "Alanna. She was brunette. She had… grey eyes. Her dad said maybe one of her great grandfathers was Native American or something and had eyes like that. I was already going bald, even then… and she loved me anyway. She had a little something to her. She was always good for a squeeze. She could take a good squeeze. She was going to be a lawyer or a teacher or something. She hadn't quite decided yet and she'd only been in college for a semester."

"Caleb, I didn't…"

"She had one of those faces that people always thought they knew her from somewhere. I see her everywhere. In brunettes, redheads, blondes. Everywhere." Caleb took his beer out to the yard, the black of night. It was less scary than being on that porch where the kitchen light could reach his face.

Claire was just finishing up the kitchen when he stumbled back in. Far drunker than when he'd left. He grinned at her while she put the last of the dishes away. "Hey you. You wanna come up? Do a test drive?"

"You're a pig."

"Is that what you said about me all those times you couldn't talk?"

"Yes." She wiped out the sink.

"Come on." He stumbled over.

"Do you have a stash out there? Where'd you find more to drink?"

"Big guns are outside. M16s and the Johnny Walker." He stepped in close. "Come upstairs with me."

"Why? So I can be another notch on your bed post?"

"Why did you come here if I'm such a creep?" He backed off, stung.

"I don't know anyone and John trusts you with Dean." She leaned on the counter. "Go to bed. We'll talk guns in the morning."

When she turned around, he was gone. She locked up and wandered upstairs. He was sitting on his bed. He was fumbling with a dusty book. Claire took pity on him and opened it for him and helped him find the picture he was looking for. She was pretty. That rare kind of pretty that shouldn't have been in its little bits and pieces. Altogether, no man would have said no to that and she'd promised her love and life to Caleb… before she lost it. Caleb touched the picture. "I didn't tell anyone… she was pregnant. Jeff thought the reason it killed her after it raped her was because she was already pregnant."

"Could've, would've. We'll never know. Go to bed, Caleb."

"Her father never loved me… until after I brought his body back. I didn't get his blessing until after Jeff got the demon out. After it was too late."

Claire took the picture out of the book for him and got him laid out. She lay next to him and stroked his head as he babbled on and on about Alanna. He relaxed for a second and she closed her eyes. Next thing she knew, it was morning and he was starting to wake up.

The first thing Caleb saw was the picture, he jerked awake and sat up. Startled, he turned to see Claire. He bowed his head. He sat on the edge of his bed and closed his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"I think everyone in this life has this night…. And I wish I could say it was just once." Claire shut her eyes and tried not to think of those eyes and the green skin and the…

"Breakfast. Let's eat." Caleb ripped her out of her waking nightmare. "I'll cook or buy."

"I need a shower. I smell like drunk." Claire sat up and headed straight to the little shower off Caleb's room. Caleb nearly cried again. He got up and got her bag for her. Then he went downstairs to take inventory. He got breakfast going. Stuff that was comforting. Potatoes, bacon, eggs, biscuits, gravy. Everything was plated before he realized that Claire had come in at some point and gotten the coffee going. He felt wrong, sitting to breakfast while he was sweaty and gross. He excused himself and got washed up. When he returned, she was serving his plate. She handed the gravy to him so he could douse what he would like.

They ate in silence for a long time. When it was over, Caleb cleaned up while Claire had a look around the house. She laid her side arm on the table. She felt Caleb walk in and out of the room. She didn't know how she felt about a man she couldn't stand who had seen so much evil that he was cowed by what he'd mumbled while drunk. John was a dick to most people. They all respected him. Bobby had once said that most people knew about John before he walked in the door. The story of what happened to his family had been that terrible. The man he'd become was that different from the man he was.

When Caleb came back in, he had an armful of weapons. "I picked what I thought you could handle, based on the grip on your gun and your training with the Airforce. In addition to fire arms, you're going to need spiritual items and those will take some time to get. I could give you my supply but there's a whisper that you imprint your weapons with your spirit and I never like to jinx a person."

"How much?" Claire eyed the spread even as he continued to lay weapons on the table.

"I've never gotten to outfit a person myself. This one's on me. If anything goes wrong, it's my fault and I won't have anyone say it was because you couldn't pay or I was taking advantage."

"You're a good man, Caleb."

"I thought I was a pig."

"You're still a pig but you're a good man." She looked them all over. "You got someplace I can get used to them?"

"Yeah. Firing range outside of town. They'll let you have all the hours you want. You just tell them I sent you and they'll set you out where no one can see you."

"Hey… John's got the truck outfitted with…"

"The case… Let me show you what I have in store for that man's truck… and we can do something for that piece of shit out there. John's paying for this and you will, too."

Claire's mouth turned up at the corners. "Put mine on John's tab. That man owes me."

"What in the hell did he do to lose you?" Caleb stared at her with a grin.

"It's what he didn't do."

"Tell me… so I don't make the same mistake."

"When a woman loves you, you love her back." She picked up her hand gun and stepped outside. He followed but didn't step outside. She ran a hand through her hair. "So, this magical stuff… John always had what we needed. Never saw him get what he needed."

"Yeah, you'll need some contacts. It's a roadtrip, indeed."

"I got nowhere to be. If you don't mind."

"Trapped in a jeep with a beautiful woman. I don't mind."

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 4

* * *

Caleb answered his phone when they were in California gathering imported herbs. He almost laughed when he heard the familiar voice. "How's it hanging man? You still got that blonde hottie on your six?"

There was a grunt. "I was wondering if you'd seen her, actually."

Caleb watched her move from stall to stall trying to identify what Caleb had sent her over there for. "She get lost?"

"No… I guess not."

"Dude, she took off? That sucks. But you know… if I find her… I'll wait a day before I nail her."

"Shut the fuck up, Caleb." Beep.

Claire looked over at him with a bundle. "This it?"

"Yep. Next on our list?"

"Sleep?" She asked hopefully.

"You got it." Caleb put his phone away.

"Who called?"

"No one important."

Claire led the way to the double where he crashed on his bed and she spent half an hour in the bathroom. When she came out, she looked dead. Caleb didn't ask as she crashed on her bed. The first few nights out on this trip, she'd gotten her own room. Then as the trip stretched out, they agreed to share space to give her time to replenish her funds. She hadn't told him to stay on his side of the room and he hadn't given her a reason to. She'd relaxed and he'd remembered that his parents had raised him to be a gentleman. Nightmares were soothed with just a name tossed from one side of the room to the other. Nights spent describing nightmares and things that crept in the dark.

She was different just now. He almost told her that John had called. He almost went there but he had to understand. She had her face in her pillow. Caleb stared at the ceiling. "What did you see in him? Winchester?"

"What's not to see? All the visuals are pretty compelling." She shifted so her voice wasn't so muffled.

"So it's the hair." He motioned over his bald head.

"The hair, the smile… the beard when he has it. The arms. The eyes. Damn those eyes."

"So, why am I disgusting? Cause I'm bald?"

"You make you disgusting. You're not bad to look at but you act like a jackass."

He glanced over at her, her eyes were closed. He just couldn't stand it. John was _old._ "John's a dick."

"Not to women." She picked up her head. "Why are we talking about John?"

"You're right. Let's go to sleep."

"No, I'm not sleepy now." She stared at him. "What? Did you hear me peeing on that stick from out here?"

"Oh Jesus." Caleb shut his eyes. "That's perfect. What? You got John's bun baking in your oven?"

"No. I don't. You're an asshole." She turned her head away from him.

Caleb stared at her form for a long moment. Thought he saw a hitch in her shoulders. "Claire. I'm sorry. I didn't know."

"It's for the best anyway. He wouldn't want it."

"Anything I can do?"

"I need to kill something."

* * *

Two more states and a library and a collection of magic herbs, Caleb had all the tools to build her trunk out. He took the measurements and got started marking out the steel. She got real comfortable in his house. Eating her breakfast barefoot while reading the obits. Stocking his fridge with things he didn't want to eat. They drank together, watched television together. Slept in separate rooms. They worked out IDs and back-stories. It was fun.

It was one of those nights. Drinking but not drunk. Fun but not hilarious. Going to bed and there before he left her at her door, she kissed him. Before he had time to register it, she was gone and her door was shut. He went to his room and drank and stared at the ceiling. When he got out of the shower in the morning, she was gone.

He got his routine going again. Reading, breakfast, training, guns. Only he started sleeping a bit early in the morning. Sitting in the dark for short bouts, then longer bouts. Hunting things in the dark that didn't need the dark for cover. He ran a few hunts with Jefferson. He ran a few errands for Jim. Sold Bobby a few guns. Started to go out and pick up women.

Then he found himself home and drunk. He got in his Jeep and crossed town. He sat on the porch with the old man for two hours. They didn't speak. They just sat for two hours. Around sunset, she hauled them in for dinner. She sniffled a bit but provided enough conversation for them all.

"I got the asparagus at the market. They said it was just right. I think it's wonderful. And the tomatoes. The little ones, they were just too sour. I'll wait for the heirlooms." She pushed her food around her plate.

Alan pulled out the rum and poured everyone a drink. He and Caleb were the only ones who imbibed and imbibed. Josephine was content to keep talking.

"Adrian is bringing the children by this weekend. Such beautiful little boys. I wish they'd try for a girl though."

Caleb ate asparagus and pot roast and roasted potatoes. The gravy was thin but he ate it anyway and kept drinking. She just kept talking. "The fall concert is going to be beautiful. I heard that they're learning some Beatles songs."

Alan got up and disappeared while Josephine cut slices of cake. Caleb dutifully ate his slice. Josephine picked at hers. She stared at him. "I saw you in the spring. You seemed happier." He shrugged. "Are you seeing anyone?" He shook his head. "You should. You should stop coming here."

"It's been pointed out that I'm somewhat of a pig and I don't know how to talk to women."

"You were a gentleman once. You were going to marry my daughter and we were looking forward to your joining our family." She reminded him as she dabbed at her eyes.

"I always remember her birthday."

"I appreciate that."

"I just… started to enjoy night again. Not just… having fun at night but… the night itself."

"You're different, Caleb."

"I'm not."

"You are. I don't know what to make of it… but you're not driving yourself home. I'm calling Adrian."

"Don't bother him." Caleb shook his head. "He's got little ones."

"I always wished she could have left us with someone…"

Caleb stared at her for the longest moment. "I should have told you."

"Told me what?"

Caleb's phone rang, interrupting. He stood up to answer it and almost fell. "I'm at… a friend's house." Caleb leaned on the chair and shut his eyes. Let her voice wash over him. "Come get me. Please." He gave directions and opened his eyes to Josephine's tear-streaked face.

"Told me what?"

"My friend is coming to get me. I'll get out of your hair, soon." Caleb sat back down. He finished his cake and washed it down with the last of his rum.

"Caleb. Tell me."

"She was pregnant." Caleb took a breath and let it out slowly. "We didn't want to tell anyone too soon and she wanted to finish the semester."

"She never told me. Why?"

"She… wanted to have a secret for once. Everyone always knew everything and she and I had been together forever." Caleb shook his head slowly. "She used to make plans for us. Draw pictures of what our children would look like. She wanted our baby to have my eyes and I wanted our baby to have her eyes."

"I would have liked a blue-eyed grandbaby." Josephine sniffed. "Why didn't… Did Alan know?"

"I asked the detectives not to tell you. They had to clear me and Alan wasn't my friend in those days. I told the truth… that no one knew but the two of us and the doctor."

"Why tell me now?"

"You said I should stop coming. I need a reason to stay away." Caleb nodded to her as Alan was entering with Claire in tow.

"Hi." Claire waved awkwardly. "Claire Reid."

"Claire. Alan and Josephine Chase." Caleb made the introduction.

"I came to commiserate but you're already at the bottom of a bottle." Claire cleared her throat.

"I should be going." Caleb got to his feet.

"She's very pretty." Josephine told him softly. "Be nice to her."

"Only if she's nice to me first." Caleb stumbled to the door.

Claire waved to them and then got herself under his arm to help him to her car. She thought he might try to steal some touch but she didn't have his attention. Not at all. He stared at his Jeep for a long moment. It was Alanna's Jeep. He always took it hunting but he had never outfitted it. Had never built it out like he had helped several others do to their vehicles in order to maintain a low profile. He handed Claire the keys to the Jeep. "Go put them under the seat. I can't take her back now. Not ever."

Claire did as told and when she returned, Caleb was staring straight ahead though the old couple was still standing on the porch, watching. They drove to his house. Claire had never realized just how far out he lived until that long ride from town. Far out enough to be alone but close enough to be civilized when it suited. Caleb waited for her to help him. He didn't look at her, didn't try any cute lines. That's when she saw the pain for what it was. So deep that he'd had to sink into it rather than claw his way out. She unlocked his door with his keys and she helped him upstairs. She offered to stay with him but he shook his head. Wouldn't even take the waste basket when she offered to have it nearby. He was sitting next to the lamp and had his hands on the photo album when she gave up and left him to himself.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 5

Caleb woke to the smells of breakfast. Claire was downstairs nursing a cup of coffee. She stared out the window. "I meant to ask last night if I could crash here for a while… but you were in a state…"

He shrugged. "How long?"

"I don't know."

"Yeah. Of course." He nodded and helped himself to a waffle and hashbrowns. "Keep cooking like this and you can stay forever."

She stared into her cup for a long moment. "Those were her parents? Laina?"

"Alanna. Yesterday was her birthday." He sank into his chair with a fork. "I think it's the last one I'll spend with them. Let's talk about something else."

So Claire talked about her son. For hours. Until she ran out of things to say. Caleb listened to her soft voice, just a bit raspy. To her enthusiasm. To her longing. Watched her small smiles as she recalled the kooky way his hair stood on end since he was born or the way he always had to tell her he loved her eye to eye. His eyes were green like hers but his hair was a bit darker, probably like his father. She talked about his love of soccer and how he often slept in his uniform. How he loved to tell everyone that his mother was in the Airforce and how he was going to join when he got older. It was later. When the rain was pouring down and they were sitting on the porch just letting it cage them into the house. Caleb looked at her. "So… you saw John."

Her eyebrows furrowed before she looked at him, wondering how he knew. "We got rid of some witches together."

"How did that work out?"

"Fine. Nothing's changed really. Maybe I really let go this time." She nodded to her car. "Dean and Bobby fixed up my car. Said to give him a call if it starts falling apart. He's such a good guy."

Caleb nodded to the change in subject. "You ready to put the trunk in?"

"Are you?"

"When the rain stops."

"After…" Claire stared at her bare toes. "After we put in the trunk and get me finally organized… will you come with me to Kansas?"

"What's in Kansas?"

"What's left of my family." She shrugged at him. "I tried to go back a couple of times. Once, even with some support, but I… I couldn't make myself get all the way there."

"Okay." He owed her that much.

They spent the next few days in companionable silence. She joined his routine of reading, cleaning and eating. She asked questions, he answered what he could. Sometimes they discussed some aspects of hunting and he watched her try to find her own way rather than rely on the Winchester law as she had in the past couple of years. They built out the trunk of her car and when it was done she reached for him. He almost pulled back. Her face was so close to his. She didn't quite let him kiss her. Her hands held his ribs and he was just too afraid to pull her to him. She led him around by his dick until they were out of the barn and in the half-light of the yard. That's when he knew that she would be the death of him. He would follow her around with these half-kisses for the rest of his life, grateful that he got a graze of skin, a taste of breath. She pulled him with her to their knees and finally let him kiss her. She pulled at his clothes and moved hers around and there in the middle of the yard, halfway between the house and the barn, half in the light and half in the dark, Caleb forgot that he hated the dark.

How could he hate the dark when he was sinking into Claire under the stars? When her eyes were just slits and her mouth released his name in such tantalizing breaths. No underwear to get in the way. Buttons easily pulled open. Skin so soft. Her hands pulling at him, pulling his shoulders toward her, shoving his shirt up, sliding down and taking his pants with them, grabbing his ass when she needed more. Grass in her hair as she held him against her, catching her breath. Caleb breathed in the scent of her skin, easing away but not far. Not far at all because they went again.

Then again on the porch. The kitchen. The living room. The stairs. By the time they hit his bed, they were too tired to fuck again. In the morning, Caleb woke and he absolutely did not want to get out of bed or else find out he'd just had the best dream ever. She was asleep beside him, her arm thrown across his chest. When she woke, she gave him a smile before cuddling in close, her lips running over this skin of his arm. "How long have you been up?"

"Little while."

"We should go out for breakfast."

"Might be lunch time."

"Then we should do that."

"I don't know if I can stand up."

She laughed and kissed his mouth. "Me either but I'm starving." She kissed his chin, then his neck. "Meet you in the shower."

"Shower." He nodded and watched her scoot away. Watched all the parts that bounced as she got the shower ready. When she had a good steam going, he joined her, still not sure it wasn't all just a dream. Against the wall in his shower, her eyes told him that it was all real but he still wasn't sure.

He watched her get dressed, her long blonde hair dripping on everything as she got a too-big dress over some sort of silky number that might have been a hair too small around the hips. No panties. She caught him staring. "I've never worn them."

"Hottest thing you could ever say about underwear."

They took her car into town. She pulled him around by his hand. They had lunch at a Cuban place that he hadn't known existed. He'd had no clue about the allure of pork and pickles. Then he took her for ice cream at a place he'd known since he was a kid. They were in line for the sweet stuff when he realized she was all over him. That she was there with him and claiming him in front of God and everyone and he hadn't done that with someone in the daylight in over ten years. Made his hand grip her waist tight, hold her closer than he should. They took their ice cream down the street to window shop like real people.

Caleb stared down at her and she tried to step back but he didn't let her. "Caleb?"

"When did this happen?"

"I don't understand."

"Trust me. I can't believe I'm questioning this right now but…" He swallowed down a lump. "You hate me."

"I don't. I don't think I ever did."

"What are we doing right now?"

"I don't know. I've never done this… like this… before." Her big green eyes were so wet, he wished he'd just kept going with it. "Do you want to stop?"

"God, no. I've never hit the high numbers like this before. You're single-handedly raising my stats."

She laughed and cut it off with a little punch to his ribs. "I've never had a good guy like you… look at me the way you look at me."

"Hey…"

"You are a good guy, Caleb. I think you forgot while being a bad boy…"

"What about you?"

"I've always been me." She lowered her eyes to her melting ice cream. "Do I come on too strong?"

"I think I need that." He kissed her, initiated a moment for the first time. "You going to stay with me?"

"You going to come with me to Kansas?"

"Yes."

"Caleb." The voice came from somewhere. Caleb's world spun as he tried to identify the voice. His eyes found Adrian and his family walking toward them. His instinct was to push her away but he wanted to hide behind her. "So, this is the girl, Mom was talking about."

"Adrian Chase, Claire Reid." Caleb made the introductions and loosened his grip on her. Claire was her charming self and made small talk until Adrian's children tugged him away to more interesting places.

Claire nibbled at her ice cream and led Caleb around the square while his brain whirred. He absentmindedly had a lick at his ice cream every couple of steps. She sat him on a bench and sat next to him. "You embarrassed of me?"

"No." He shook his head. "I just… it was a bad night at their place. I don't know… I meant not to see anyone again. It was gonna be the last time… I don't really come to town like this."

Ice cream gone and the breeze rustling her dress, Claire kissed his mouth and laid her mouth to his ear while she told him about all the things she was going to do to him when he got her back to the house. That calmed him somehow. He knew exactly what to do. She made him drive her car and she kept touching him and whispering in his ear. They didn't make out of the car for the first round. Claire kissed him big, gasping in deep breaths full of his smell. She didn't move to get off him or out of the car. Her dress hung open, her slip bunched around her waist, the bodice wet from his mouth. She stared at him, lids half-mast over his blue eyes. Blue like the sky outside. Thin eyebrows furrowed, she smoothed them out with her thumbs. It transformed his face from scowl to relaxed. She kissed his bottom lip, his top lip just vanished no matter what he did. But she liked it. She tried not to remember that John had a similar thing going on.

Caleb's face was so… different. So… good. Skin stretched across bone and when he opened his eyes, she just wanted to dive into them. She licked her lips and her mouth was so dry. "I'm sorry I was such a bitch when we met."

"Well… I… am not sorry for being a pig."

"No?" She laughed.

"No."

She touched his cheekbones and kissed his freckles, slid a hand over the top of his head. It pointed a bit. She both loved and was frightened of it. She didn't know why. She shifted and let him slip out of her body. "Take me to bed."

Caleb watched her climb out, she didn't bother to fix her slip. He got himself tucked in to follow her. The neighbors weren't really that close but close enough. Daylight kitchen table sex. Beautiful. She sat on the couch, in just her dress, hanging open, eating pineapple out of a can and Caleb panicked a bit.

He watched her from the doorway. She was flipping through a book on incantations, eating pineapple, not caring if she was dripping juice on her tits. And he was hard again. He plopped down on the other side of the couch. "Where in the world did you get that dress? It's like… nine sizes too big."

"Bobby."

"Does he cross dress?"

"It was his wife's. She was… sturdy."

"Sturdy?" Caleb asked.

"She was thick. Solid. Yes, the dress is too big." She finished and pretended to huff and cover herself with the folds of thin fabric. "It's really comfortable though. It was one of the first pieces of clothing I acquired after… the Pixies. I'm fond of it."

"Do you have any clothes that are yours?"

"No, but I've been making do. I get some stuff when I have some funds left over."

"I don't mind. I personally wouldn't mind if you turned my house into a nudist colony."

She set the book aside, her can on the floor. She opened the dress and let him look his fill. "I think that if I did that… we'd die of starvation and exhaustion."

"You might be right." He nodded as he crawled over to her.

"You're not tired of me, yet?"

"Oh God, no." He shook his head before dipping his head to kiss her thighs.

"I thought you were a one-night kind of man."

"Usually, I am." He admitted. "But… I keep thinking that if I stop… If I get complacent for a second… then you'll leave… and I'll kick myself forever."

"Then don't stop. Never stop." She shut her eyes as his mouth closed over her clit. His name was a litany, a mantra, that just slid off her lips over and over.

Later, showered and fed and dozing in bed, Claire was tired. Fully. She laid out on her own pillow but her arm draped over his chest, her hand stroking the stubble on his chin. Caleb rolled closer, arm under his pillow. "When do you want to go?"

"Tomorrow."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 6

* * *

Caleb lounged in the motel bed while Claire went about getting ready. Back at his place, it was very quick. Shower, clothes and out the door with that sexy bed hair that made him want to take her back to bed. Here… was different. She showered, shaved, makeup. The clothes. He'd seen them before but he hadn't realized the work those clothes took. She'd taken a pillow case off the pillow and laid it over her blouse for a quick iron. She did the same for that skirt, the one with the pleats that made him want to bend her over a chair. She pulled hose out of a pocket of her bag. The hose was maddening to watch her put on. Then she smoothed her hair back into a bun. Bobby-pins tucked away until it looked as if her hair held itself in that position.

Then she sat on the chair and stared at her bag for a moment. She stared at the wall and whispered something to herself. She pulled a string of pearls out and wouldn't let him help her put them on. She stared at her reflection for a long time. "I'm not this person anymore."

"How do you know you're not?"

"It all feels wrong but I don't want to visit him dressed like a hunter."

"What about that girl who took me on a walk downtown in my own town like I was a stranger?"

"She's not his mother." She pointed to her reflection. "That's his mom. There."

"Come on. Let's go. Or do I need to iron my shirt first?"

She stood and looked him over when he presented himself for inspection. She pecked his lips as she straightened his shirt and tucked in his tails. She smoothed her hands over his chest. She smiled. "I like this color on you. Your eyes just… You are so handsome."

The drive was quiet but he followed her motions on where to turn and where to park. He followed her out down the trails and waited when she stopped to gather her strength. She almost walked back except he didn't follow her. He waited until she huffed and walked back toward her goal. The flowers she'd bought were having a tough time holding together in her hands.

Finally she was knelt in front of a headstone. It had just his name, a date and a soccer ball engraved on it. Sebastien Reid. She placed the floors. "Hi, baby. I'm sorry I've been gone so long. Mommy loves you."

Caleb stood and kept watch while she told her son the basics of why she'd been away. He pretended not to care. "Mommy went for a drive and a monster caught her. A handsome man saved her and he taught her how to fight monsters and that's what I do now. We killed the monsters like the one that hurt me. We did it. I just… wish… I could do something about the person who took you from me. I miss you so much… Mommy brought a friend. I think you would've liked him…" She laughed. "He eats his sandwiches like you, you crazy boy. Tears all the crusts off and then eats them first before his sandwich. He wasn't in the Airforce like me but he knows a lot about guns and I think you'd think he's okay.

"I'm gonna visit you, more. I promise. Maybe Caleb will come with me. Maybe he'll stay at home. Sometimes… you're gonna see me and I'm going to look like hell. It's okay. Mommy's just been fighting monsters. I love you, kiddo."

Then Caleb stood guard while she cried silently. When she'd had her fill, he helped her up and they made their slow way back to the car. They had almost made it when a madman came running from the cemetery. "Wait!"

Caleb reached for his gun but Claire grabbed his hand. "Us?"

"Were you visiting the Reid boy?"

"Yes." Her posture changed, loosening her grip on his gun arm.

"Oh." He slowed and caught his breath. "Do you know his mother?"

"I am his mother." Her back went even straighter.

"I'm so sorry. There was a detective who came by once and asked me to keep a look out. He was trying to get you some information. I'm afraid I don't have the card anymore. He was from Kansas City PD, though."

"Thank you." Claire nodded and turned Caleb to the car. "Just… some information?"

"He thought he had a lead." The groundkeeper nodded. "It was… just over a year ago, I suppose."

"Thank you. Really. Thank you." She nodded and climbed into the car. They sat for a long moment.

"You haven't eaten." Caleb put the car in gear. "Let's get something simple down and then we'll go."

"We don't have to."

He kept driving. He pulled into a diner and opened her door for her to make her get out of the car. He ordered for them. Got her a cob salad and got himself a steak and a potato that he figured she'd steal from him. She stared at her nails. Her eyes red. She looked up at him. Then she turned her gaze to the restaurant. The fingers of one hand kept smoothing her hair back. The fingers of the other tapped on the tabletop. "Come over here."

Caleb scooted back and she took a seat on the end of his bench. He hauled her back against him. He held her tight and she relaxed a bit, her legs crossed and feet tucked in. Small as she could make herself. "How about I call the station and see if anyone knows anything? Then we'll go from there."

She nodded mutely. He kissed her hair and held on until she moved. She moved back to her seat and stared at her nails for a long minute. Her eyes flicked up a couple of times. Caleb pulled out his cellphone and walked over to the counter. He got the phone number he needed and stepped outside.

It took a minute to get the man on the desk to transfer him over to a detective, any detective. Finally, he got someone. "Yeah… um… Name's Caleb. I took a friend out to the cemetery over on Clifton to see her… her kid and the groundkeeper was… Said some detective asked him to keep an eye out for her."

"What's her name?"

"Claire Reid. Mother of Sebastien Reid."

"Hang on."

He waited and watched his steak arrive by the time the next guy came on. "This is Art."

"Caleb. Looking for the detective looking into Claire and Sebastien Reid." Then Caleb had to tell his story again. Then again. Then again to Detective Lionel Tyson. "You the man we're looking for?"

"I may be. Where is Ms. Reid?"

"Senior Airman Reid."

"You're right."

"Well, the two of us are trying to get some lunch in us. She was upset when she found someone was looking for her because there was news in her son's case. Now, I can go back to the table and let her know that no one knows anything or I can go back and let her have my steak boxed up cause she's in a rush to get to you."

"You her husband?"

"No. Just the man she trusted to make this phone call for her."

"She can't speak."

"I'm sure that's a story she'd rather tell herself."

"Well, what I got… she may not want to hear. Tell the truth… not many around here liked my story and… not sure my reputation is up to snuff. If it were my boy… I want to hear it at least."

"I'll bring her by."

Claire had eaten about a half a bite of her salad. He motioned to her to keep eating as he tucked into his steak. It was still warm. He ate about six bites and a third of his potato before he got their lunch to go. She stared at him the whole time. When they were back in the car, she just stared. Then she hit him. "Caleb! What did he say?"

"Not a whole lot but… he's making time to see you."

Her eyes shut and she stayed that way until he stopped the car in front of the station. Her hand was tangled in her pearls. It took seven long minutes before she opened the door and got out. He followed her and let her clench her hand in his shirt while she waited for Detective Tyson. They were escorted to an interrogation room. He held a file in his hand when he shut the door. He took a breath. "I looked for you. I thought I had a lead a few months ago but…"

Claire cleared her throat. "I… uh… sort… When I left Kansas City… I was assaulted and… called it hysterics. I was… mute and I had amnesia."

"As I understand it… there's plenty you would have rather forgot." He pulled a faxed photo out of the file. "Someone else was looking for you."

"My ex." Claire nodded to the photo. "He had a hard time letting go when I got my memory back."

Caleb stiffened beside her. She found his hand with hers. She looked at the detective. He took a breath. "I've been called a few names over my investigation. I didn't bring it up when we were first looking into it because… well… it's crazy."

"You haven't known crazy until you know what I've been through since he died."

"Alright. I'll lay out, then." He breathed deeply. "When you left town, I started getting these… ideas. It started when Sebastien's grandmother came looking for him. It seems that you put his father's name on the birth certificate and he should have been getting government checks due to his death in action. Did you know about that?"

"It crossed my mind when I was pregnant but I never pursued it. Didn't seem to be a point. I didn't even know that he had family. I never thought to look for them."

"Well, the government kept routing these checks in his name to her house. By the time she figured out what had happened, Sebastien was gone and so were you. She asked me to look into the accident. I humored her. I moonlight as a P.I.. I took her case and I started looking at what happened and how it happened. The boys didn't remember much. They just remembered that it was sudden. Neighborhood we're talking about shouldn't anyone been going so fast."

Claire squeezed Caleb's hand and he held it between his hands.

"Anyway, I looked around at streetlights and traffic cameras. We didn't have so many of them around that time but there was a security system setup a few blocks away. I logged weeks in reviewing those cameras and matching traffic patterns and going over the photos from the scene. We didn't do such an in depth job back then, I'm afraid.

"Well, all the while that I'm going through the evidence and interviews and trying like hell to find you… Mrs. Stephens hangs around a lot. She tells me all these stories about her boys. She's got three of 'em. Your fellow who died in Bosnia… then she's got this kid who's in med school and this kid who just graduated high school. She goes on and on about him. Talks about him like he's the second coming. I mostly just listen because she seemed to need it. Something was off though.

"I got this break. A partial license plate and a model. It's enough that I spent three months looking at cars and asking for alibis. I find the guy. He's a car salesman. He was test driving a customer's car but the guy couldn't remember what happened. He just kept saying that… something got in him."

Caleb squeezed Claire's hand, hard. They exchanged a look.

"Someone else looked like the two of you when I relayed that bit. That was a psychic who saw me pacing outside that car salesman's Lawrence lot. She told me that I shouldn't ask anymore questions and that I shouldn't see Mrs. Stephens again. I went back to tell Mrs. Stephens that I couldn't come up with anything conclusive. I didn't haul the guy in because I wanted to watch him. I wanted to make sure." Tyson took a breath. "I'll tell you. I thought I was crazy. Her eyes turned black, she leapt across the desk and demanded I tell her where the man was, where you were… and that's when that psychic showed up. She said something that made Mrs. Stephens's head whip around fast. She said that she was going to get the right son on the throne and she had better stay out of it.

"Now… I'm not an expert but after the conversation I had with the psychic and after what I found regarding the Stephens' boys… I'd have to say the fellow who hit your son that day was…"

"Possessed." Claire whispered.

"That was the word I was looking for."

"When I left Kansas City and I was assaulted… it wasn't by a man. It was a monster." Claire fiddled with her pearls with her free hand. "It was a sort of… magic that took my memories and my voice. The man who rescued me… he… this is what he did. He found the monsters and the possessed folk and he set things right. I've been dealing with this since I left… I never even for a moment thought…"

"And you…" Tyson looked from Claire to Caleb.

"It's the life I lead."

"Then you should take over. I'm out of my depth. I've seen things."

"We should have a longer conversation… later." Caleb told him as he stood. He picked up the file and tucked it into his jacket. Claire let the way out. Back in the room, she read through the file as Caleb finished his lunch and hers.

"He's… innocent." She declared.

"We could try something." Caleb cleared his throat. "I've never done but… I've heard that a part gets left behind in a possessed person. You can call the spirit back."

"That's cruel."

"That man… that innocent man… probably remembers what happened that day. He'll say he doesn't if he's got even a touch of the villain in him… or else he would have turned himself in when it happened."

"What about this psychic?"

"Never heard of a real one."

Claire listened to the old detective relay his tale from start to finish. She and Caleb made notes. They gleaned all they could from the man that just wanted to leave it all behind. Then Claire started research on something she'd never tried before. Her one night stand in Bosnia. Her son's other family. It was startling as she started to dig. Things jumped out at her. Caleb's silence told her that this story matched another he'd heard. She didn't want to call John or Dean.

Caleb frowned at the dates. He knew John's story. Everyone knew some of John's story. Claire looked up what matched what she could remember from his journal. She didn't even realize she'd stopped talking until Caleb pointed it out. He kissed her head and walked outside.

Henry Stephens was the oldest of three boys. He enlisted straight out of high school. His younger brother was in medical school and his baby brother was Sam Winchester's age. There was a house fire that took the life of the Elder Stephens the year his youngest son was born. Henry died first in Kosovo. Michael died in a bar brawl near his college campus. David had just enrolled in college himself when he was hit by a car. According to an autopsy, Mrs. Stephens showed rapid decay for a woman who'd fallen down a flight of stairs a few months ago and barely lay a day before her body was discovered.

So, they went to see the psychic. She was a harried woman who made noises at the sight of Claire. Disapproval noises. She clucked at Caleb. She sat them down and stared at them. "Hunters. Can't get an honest read off of either of you."

"Detective Tyson came to see you about Sebastien Reid." Claire blurted out.

"Oh." She gasped. "You're his mother."

"I am." Claire nodded. She was dressed like a hunter and it felt wrong to admit she was his mother when she didn't look like the person who gave birth to that sweet boy.

"I didn't put it together before. Detective Tyson didn't know enough and that damned spirit was tricky. Your son was part of a bigger picture."

"I think so. Everything I've looked into since Tyson talked to us… I'm scared. The damage has been done to my life but… the picture I see… it's… a lot like someone else's picture only in mine… everyone's dead. Every last everyone but me."

"And you? Where do you fit in this picture?" The psychic motioned to Caleb.

"I'm new to the picture but I heard some stories about something like this happening before."

"Care to share?"

"A buddy of mine. Lost his wife in a house fire when his kids were young. They're all grown now but they've been out hunting creatures looking for the thing that killed his wife."

"John Winchester came to see me when that wife of his was burned on the nursery ceiling." She nodded to them. "I know his story. My name is Missouri and I'll do what I can to help."

Claire bit her lip and shrugged off Caleb's hand when it landed on her shoulder. "I can't escape that man."

"No one can. Even I was in his thrall once." Missouri reassured the woman. "I'm going to help you and you're going to be okay."

"You see that?"

"In a manner of speaking. Any friend of John's is a friend of mine… even if she bit off more than she can chew. John Winchester is not for the faint of heart. I have a feeling that wife of his was more than John could handle, himself."

In the end, the three of them wound up in the salesman's house, the house bound, the man bound. Missouri called up the spirit who had crawled inside the man. It was a nasty one. Claire stood over the bound man, sick to her stomach but sure in her purpose. When its eyes turned black and it laughed at her, she was surer than she had ever been that she needed to know.

"Why did you kill my son?"

"Why does anyone kill anyone, really?" It grinned. "I mean… he was just a boy. You can have more."

"Then why kill my boy if he was just a boy."

"I heard you got you a taste of Pixie dick. Heard you couldn't get enough."

She threw holy water on it. It screamed. Then it laughed. "Sorry. I meant Winchester dick. I've heard its quite addicting. That ol' John sure does make the ladies wet and wanting. He's got ports all over this storm. Heard he'd had enough of you and gone back to some other port. He does like to dock."

"Why my son?"

"Wrong question." It replied.

"Okay." Claire looked to Missouri and Caleb. "Why Henry Stephens's son?"

"Ah. So you looked up the family tree at last."

"All of the Stephens family are dead. Every last one of them."

"Well, they do say that blood will out and well… the proof is in the pudding."

"That doesn't make any sense."

"I had orders."

"From whom?"

"Everyone has their orders. I just… had your kid's name in my bucket. Took me a while to find him. Didn't know Henry could get tail like you. You got that special flavor. Pixies sure liked it."

"It's evading your questions. Make them tighter." Missouri prompted.

"Why did they have to die? What were your orders?"

"Eliminate the competition."

"For what?"

"Even I don't have those orders."

"Why did those fires happen? At the Stephens, at the Winchester's."

"Maybe it was a test. The first test. Maybe the Stephens failed."

"Why them? Why the Stephens?"

"Marjourie Stephens made a deal with a devil and she was blessed with a brood of strapping young lads. Maybe she just had the wrong stud."

"We're not going to get anything else out of it." Caleb warned.

"You know… if the boss could have seen you now, we may not have taken the boy. We only saw you then. A pitiful excuse for a woman. Playing at house. Teaching the kiddos the ABCs and 123s. You need a warrior to do battle. A soldier will sometimes make it out. It never happens for the regular folk. You have to have that spark."

"A spark?"

"Like you. Those eyes, that hair. Made you tastey. That fire Winchester lit in your pussy just consumed you and look at you now. A hunter. Fucking other hunters. You could breed up a nuisance if you put a mind to it. But you won't. You're so scared. This world is too big for you."

"Let's end it." Caleb started chanting his incantation to send the spirit to hell.

"Just like that? Don't I get a last meal. I mean… I could just kill for some French fries."

Missouri cut the man loose just as the spirit was gone. Then Caleb shot the man in the head. Claire stared at him. "What did you do?"

Missouri pulled her aside. "Honey… if we could pull that spirit back through him, so could someone else. It had to be done. That man was made to murder a whole family. He had to live with that and I'm sure he would have rather not."

"I didn't understand anything." Claire looked between them.

"I'll talk to John." Missouri told them both. "You… stay out of it."

"What?" Claire blurted out.

"I know John. He's too hot in the collar to handle you in all this mess. I'll get him what he needs."

"She's right." Caleb agreed.

"I don't understand anything." Claire snapped at them, eyes wide and staring at that poor dead salesman.

"Caleb, honey. Clean up. I'll take Claire for a walk."

Claire let Missouri lead her around the house to the cars. It was dark out. "I don't…"

"I know, honey. I don't know you. I think I remember some words about Caleb from John. I got some of what John needs from that spirit. I know it was a mess of nonsense to you but I've been helping John with this problem since the beginning. I know that the last thing he needs is you. Don't take that the wrong way but you will split his attention in a way that he can't have while he hunts this thing down."

Claire leaned on her car. "My son is dead and I don't know why except that thing in there killed every person in his family except me. Competition… I mean…"

"I know it's confusing. There are things that have happened that we're not talking about to anyone. Anyone. It's for the protection of everyone involved." She stared at her. "You love him."

"Who? John?"

"Well, him, too." Missouri grinned. "John is intense. It's his only setting and even he knows when it's too much for someone. Caleb though… he's never done this. He's nervous. He cares about John and he'd step aside if he thought John was still in the game."

"This is a ridiculous conversation. It's none of your business but John and I are done. John made that quite clear. Caleb and I are too new to know what's going to happen."

"Spirits will lie to you. They'll use the truth to mess with your head." She climbed into the car as Caleb came around the side of the house. Caleb stared at Claire. Claire stared back.

The ride to Missouri's was a long quiet one. Caleb waited for it and he got it as soon as they were in the living room and Missouri had gone to make tea. "You never told me we were going to kill him!"

"Sh." Caleb took her face in his hands. "I'm sorry. I just… it had to be done."

"You should have told me. And you know. You know something about what Missouri is not telling me." She tossed his arms away.

"I can't."

"Why?"

"Claire…" He stood there, not sure how to explain it. "When John told me what happened to his family and we did all the research that we could together… I promised not to speak of it to anyone because he's going to need every edge that he can get. He's got his kids to think about."

"So Sam and Dean are more important than my boy?"

"Sam and Dean are alive."

"John has another kid." She blurted out. "He's got a third son, one who doesn't hunt, who doesn't know he has brothers, who doesn't know what John does." The knives in her chest stung as she blurted it out. She understood now. She shouldn't have said anything about that boy at all.

"Maybe it's better that way." Missouri nodded to Claire that she already knew about that boy. "I'm going to call John, now. I need you to be quiet but I need you here and near because you saw things I didn't down there."

Claire nodded while Missouri started tea before picking up the phone. Claire's eyes flicked to Caleb standing in the doorway. "Go wash up." He nodded and disappeared to find the bathroom. Claire fiddled with a placemat while Missouri left a message for John to call her back.

"I can't…" Claire stormed out of the house and kicked Caleb when he tried to follow her. He picked her up and brought her back into the house. Missouri poured them all tea and hummed softly as she washed up. Claire sipped her tea. Caleb smoked on the back porch, door open and screen door catching the flies.

When the phone rang, Claire yelped. It stopped abruptly but then started ringing again. John's signature. Missouri picked up. "John… wait... John... I said wait, dammit." Missouri took a breath and poured more tea for herself and Claire. "It's been a night, John. I'm still trying to get the words right." She hit speaker and motioned for Claire to be quiet. "I put the speaker on so Caleb can hear. He's still cleaning up from the mess we made tonight."

"You said it was important." John's gruff voice filled the air.

"We found a man who had killed all the members of Henry Stephens family. He was possessed to do it. Multiple times from the impressions I got off that poor man."

"Stephens." The sound of paper shuffling came over the line. "Henry Stephens. He was from Illinois."

Claire nodded. Missouri breathed. "Yes. Illinois."

"Hey Dean-o… I'm parched… and hungry. No pizza." John called across the room. "Hey, and none of that drive-thru nonsense. See if you can't find me a steak."

"John Winchester, that boy…" Missouri started before John cut her off.

"Is my business. So… Stephens died in his boy's room. You said a man killed the rest of his family?"

"Story I could get… The salesman had been possessed and killed every boy in that family. Killed the three boys as adults and the grandson, just a little one. Used the mother to get our attention but she'd been dead for months, couldn't tell you if the spirit did it or if it just took over when she passed. Caleb helped me call the spirit back to the body and we got what we could out of it."

"That was really dangerous, Missouri."

"Well, I had to."

"Where's the man now?"

"Caleb sent him on, so no one else can do what we did."

"So, where's the good stuff, woman?"

"Don't you "woman" me. Been a long time since I was your woman."

"Sorry. Missouri. What did you find out?"

Claire looked to Missouri and shut her eyes. Missouri took a breath. "Seems it was under orders to take out all those boys to… eliminate some competition."

"Did you get the name?"

"Afraid not but John… That family had three boys. The youngest was Sam's age."

"I know… You said it took out the grandson, too?"

Claire's shoulders shook with silent sobs. Missouri touched her hand. "Yes. Seems you knew his mother. That spirit was… well, it mentioned you and her. Seems if they had known what a hunter she'd turn into, they might have spared the boy but it didn't say why."

"Jesus Christ. Who? Who was that boy's mother?"

"Claire Reid."

"Don't you bring her into this, Missouri. You leave her alone. Was she there? Did she hear?"

"She heard enough. We sent her on her way." Missouri squeezed Claire's hand. "I can't tell her what it meant, John."

"Sammy's a good boy. They won't be able to turn him."

"I know. You raised those boys well. This does start to bring up that stuff we were talking about."

"Yeah, I guess it does.

Claire frowned, stuck on the competition. Why take out someone that was unworthy? Missouri squeezed her hand. "Thing is. That spirit told us that Claire was pathetic and her son… useless for lack of a better word. Why would it eliminate the whole family if they weren't up to snuff?"

"There were dozens of families, Missouri. Just the ones that I know of. Not… Not every family went through the same thing. I mean, they all had something done to the babies. What… I still don't know. I thought they were… soldiers. I've always been worried about turning but it's not like Cambion. There were no manifestations with Sammy or any of the other kids at that age."

"Seven. Right." Missouri sipped her tea and then rubbed her hands together.

"They're all 19 years old right now, Missouri. They're just kids. What's gonna happen to 'em?"

Claire furrowed her brow. The boys didn't know this stuff. John had sent Dean on. Meant Sam didn't know. She wondered why if he'd raised his boys to fight this stuff. Then she thought about her son. Bloodlines, breeding. Snatches of information crossed her mind.

"The bloodlines. Something is special about that boy of yours. It mentioned you specifically. That Stephens family must have had the right stuff but… someone needs your family in the fight."

"Why? My dad took off when I was a kid. My mother took up with one mechanic after another til she died. Mary… she never talked about her family. Her folks died before we were married."

"There's got to be something there, John. Something that we're missing." Missouri pressed. "When it was talking to Claire… it mentioned the pixies and her eyes and her hair. What happened there?"

"They were… Pixies. Fucking Pixies. Caleb can fill you in on the whys and wherefores but… gist was… They came out on the solstices to get blonde-haired green-eyed men and women of the drop dead gorgeous persuasion for… we never even found out what. Claire… they did a number on her. Raped, scarred, she couldn't talk for a year. Dean… I guess you could say they did the same to him. We worried for a bit after that Claire could have had some kind of hybrid… but she never turned up pregnant… not from the Pixies."

"John Winchester." Missouri stopped herself.

"Not from me, either. Not from lack of trying on her part. Nearest we could figure they were trying to pull her over to their side. They only wanted the best we had and… she made the cut. I couldn't blame them. If you had to line up some ladies to have on your side, I'd pick her out."

"Well, she is your type."

"I don't have a type."

Caleb leaned in the door. "What about what we were talking about? Blood lines."

"She gave you the slip, too, huh." John laughed.

"Sure. Why not." Caleb bit out.

"Don't be bitter." John chuckled and Claire seethed. John took a breath. "I don't know about this… line of Adam business."

"I thought it was Abel."

"No, it's Adam." John insisted. "I mean the story goes… they were born as twins. Abel and Cain's twin got their line going before Cain turned on him. Abel's twin wasn't as pretty as Cain's twin and Cain never took well to it. I don't know if their line was started before or after the slaying."

"But say… there's all these branches, they split and join and split and join… maybe some branches got more juice than others." Caleb shrugged at them.

"Maybe." Came John's response. "Maybe I should dig deeper."

"I'm going outside." Caleb lit another cigarette and let the door slam after him.

"Did you have to do that?" Missouri asked softly. "I don't know what's going on but did you have to do that?"

"No." John sighed. "I'm not as over her as I pretend to be. It was just…" He coughed. "Anyway, she should settle down with someone who doesn't hunt. She's too… everything to do what we do."

"She's good at it, John. A little naïve but damn good."

"You remember when you wanted a husband and kids and the fence."

"Hey. I got my fence." Missouri pointed at the phone.

"I was 20 years old when that was my dream. I was 30 when it burned. She could still have it. She could have any man she wants. Never have to work a day in her life."

"You're sexist and if she wants Caleb, that's her business."

"She doesn't want Caleb. She hates him. She's too good for him."

"She banged your bony butt."

"She's too good for me, too. Don't know who told her she had to latch on to any man who looked at her twice."

Claire shook her head and turned away from Missouri. Missouri cleared her throat. "Well, I'd say no accounting for taste but I banged your bony butt for a few weeks in the 80s so I'm in the same boat with that girl."

"Do me a favor, you see her again. Don't tell her you talked to me… but tell her to settle down."

"Well, then, I suspect, she'll know that I talked to you. John…"

"She needed things I couldn't give her. I'm gonna die bloody looking for this thing. She don't need to be with me for that. It's coming for me, for my boys… I can't have her blood on my hands. Yours either. Stay out of it."

"I will if you will."

"Missouri, you're crazy and that's why I love you."

"Well, you have excellent taste. You take care of that kid you got and don't forget about your other children."

"Well, they all pretty much hate me these days. Dean's the only one still following orders… and that's only cause I let a pixie get at him. That other one… well… he just figured out that I'm no good either."

The line disconnected and Claire looked at her. "Why does he think I'm so helpless?"

"He doesn't." Missouri shook her head. "He put his wife on a pedestal. She liked jumping off it, if I understand his stories at all. Just cause she could. You got some of that in you. You'd probably be fine letting some doctor or lawyer taking care of you and a whole passel of kids… if it weren't some man's idea instead of your own."

"Maybe." She shrugged and glanced at the backdoor. "I don't understand why he had to be so mean to Caleb."

"Maybe he saw something he didn't like when the two of you were still banging each other's brains out. The man gets territorial. Don't pay him no mind. He doesn't want you in the picture. He doesn't need the distraction. I wasn't going to tell him about your boy but it gave him the inspiration he needed. He wasn't going to tell you that other stuff but you need to know. You lost your boy. You'll carry that the rest of your life. You do what you want. John can go to hell."

"I gotta get out of here."

Missouri touched Claire's shoulder as she finished her tea. "You go on. Do what you have to. I'll get Caleb home."

Caleb watched her leave and let her go. Missouri poured him a cup of tea when he came inside. "John mentioned you once… before tonight."

"I suppose he did. Am I what you expected?"

"I expected a bigger 'fro."

"I did have the big hair when I met John." She laughed and then motioned to the door. "She's cute."

"She is." Caleb gulped his tea. "Why don't you like her?"

"She's cute. She's sweet. She's got the right guns for hunting both figurative and literally." Missouri sighed and shook her head. "I'd ask what in the hell John was thinking but I think we both know he wasn't."

"I know I don't." He shrugged.

"Give me one of those." Missouri took a cigarette and lit it up. Caleb lit one for himself. "John's terrified for his boys. He comes to see me every now and again when he's stumped. He hadn't been by in a while. I got most of the story off of her. She just… broadcasts. Got a little bit of the needy girlfriend in her."

"I like that about her." Caleb shook his head.

"You like that she fucks you silly because she thinks it will make you love her."

"Well, it helps." He smiled to his cigarette. "You think there's an even bigger picture?"

"The kind it takes centuries to paint."

"You think those boys were in it deep like John's boys?"

"They could have been. Means there's a lot more families out there. Probably more than John came up with when he went looking."

"I'm not going to tell her."

"You shouldn't but she may find out on her own. She seems smart… except that she sleeps with you and your reputation precedes you boy. I should have that chair tested when you vacate it."

Caleb laughed. Then his smile faded. "She's going to disappear on me."

"I said I'd get you home."

"It was time I got my own car, anyway."

"I'll tell you what I told John over and over again… it's okay to find someone to spend your life with. It doesn't mean you've forgotten that one great love."

"I think maybe… Alanna wasn't my great love. I loved her. I still do… but…"

"The blonde got under your skin. Um-hmm. I had me a man when I was young and hot and had big hair. He left when he found out I wasn't playing at being psychic. It was too real for him. Any man since has been… a shadow. A time to pass. Even John Winchester, God bless that man's smile."

"You and John?"

"For a few nights. I knew he was never going to let her go. He got me through the worse of my divorce and I got him through the worst of his grieving."

"If it's okay to find someone to spend his life with… why not her?" Caleb gestured to the door.

"If she were an uglier girl, a less needy girl… if she wasn't John's type… I'd say he'd need the support but… she's just as intense as he is. She'd suck him dry. He knew it. That's the type a man makes sacrifices for." She put out the cigarette. "Women like me… we hate women like her… just because. No rhyme, no reason. They just… seem to get it all… without trying."

"Well, she's lost a lot. Maybe you're right. Maybe he's right. Maybe she's just grasping at everything and hoping something will stick." Caleb stared at the burning end of his cigarette. "Maybe I am, too."

* * *

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 7

* * *

Caleb bought himself an older model car with a deep trunk. He spent a few weeks making gun deals and building out the trunk. It was heavy, he had to reinforce the frame and put in extra shocks to handle the weight. He got drunk every night with the lights off. It was just all darkness. He read all day. Sent books and information to John but wouldn't call the man. Too mad at him because Claire had disappeared. He'd checked Kansas City, looked all over Lawrence. She'd left her clothes behind. He stared at them in his laundry baskets. He had her favorite dress.

John and Dean pulled up. Caleb greeted them easily enough. He caught the look from John that he didn't want to talk. Caleb let it be. He let them in and made sure he'd put away Claire's things when he had a minute. He sat to dinner with those guys and they went into the night on some kind of small beast. Then John sent Dean on without them. Caleb was sitting with his bottle when John slumped down on the other side of the table. "Fuckin' kid, if I could hit 50 without being a grandfather, I'll be surprised. He can't keep it in his pants to save his life."

Caleb snorted at that. "Thought he was in love."

"Was. Then he went and blabbed to the bitch about what we do… solved itself."

"I just talked to him… like a week ago."

"And she dumped him. Dropped him like a bad habit and went on with her life. He's been moping and fucking anything with tits ever since. Some of 'em just as bad as that waitress back in Tampa." John took a long swallow from his bottle. "I got the truck detailed last week. I'm good to set a while."

"Yeah. Sure."

John cleared his throat and thumped the table. "My truck?"

"Right." Caleb nodded. "I got all the stuff. We can build that out while Dean is chasing his tail looking for chupacabra."

John chuckled. "He might find something. Kid's been burning my butt looking for his own hunts and since that damned Pixie, I won't let him do it."

"Yeah." Caleb took a drink. "You gonna pay for your build out?"

"Yeah." John nodded.

"Inflation. It's double what I last quoted."

"You're a thief."

"I'm the best."

"Yeah. Okay."

"You gonna pay for those guns?"

"I already paid you for those guns."

They stared off for a long minute before Caleb gave up. "Alright. I'll get started in the morning. Just pull it into the shed tonight."

Caleb paced all night. Then he went outside and started working on the truck. All the phones in the house sent to silent. He had all the prep work done by the time John wandered out. They set the big pieces in place and then went out to get breakfast. Caleb kept his eyes on the road. They got grease and coffee down at a truck stop outside of town so Caleb wouldn't run into anyone he knew.

After that, they went back to work on the truck, setting gears and testing hydraulics. Then John started talking. "You took Claire on a hunt?" Caleb looked up. "Why in the hell would you take her on a hunt like that?"

"She took me." Caleb bit out. "It was about her kid. We had to do it. Her kid was on a hit list. I don't know who is pulling the strings but they didn't want anyone in that kid's line alive for whatever is going on with you and your kids."

"You were there, right?" John's forehead had deep creases, his eyes on something not in the room.

"Yeah. I was there. I'm just afraid that it knows about Claire. It seemed to like her."

"What are you talking about?"

"It seemed to think that the Stephens line was too soft but after it got a load of Claire, it wished it hadn't taken out her kid. It liked her." Caleb met his eyes. "It did. I didn't want to do it in front of her but I had to… make sure."

"Thanks for that." John nodded. They worked in silence for a bit. "Talked to Jim about that information you got."

"You tell him what Missouri said about that demon we had?"

"Demon, I thought it was a spirit."

"She didn't want Claire to know how heavy it was." Caleb nodded to John how serious it was.

John stopped. "She had that whole conversation without mentioning the demon. Was Claire there for that?"

"She was there." Caleb nodded. "Missouri was reading her while you talked, trying to get the things Claire didn't know to speak about."

"That fucking…" John cut himself off. He could already feel the spoon descending on his head. "Anyway, been busy being scared shitless of what it means about my Sammy."

"I think Missouri was right. I think there's more to this than we thought. The fact that you know nothing about yours and your wife's bloodlines… that's worrying. It feels like…"

"A perfect storm of destruction?"

"Maybe."

"You know… I never gave my old man a second thought. I was so young when he left. All I remember is this stupid music box that I smashed when I realized he wasn't coming back. Mom wasn't nobody from nowhere. Mary's folks… they were so secretive and I remember that Mary hated being at home but that she loved her folks."

"Kind of like Sammy." Caleb joked.

"Well, he is the worst of the both of us." John laughed. "That's what kids are."

"What's that?"

"Any kid in the world… the worst of both its parents."

"How so?"

"Sam? Bullheaded like his mother, ornery like his father." John grunted as they popped that last bit into place so Caleb could start fine-tuning the hydros. "Dean? That kid. He got a lot of the best of us. Looks like his mom, charisma like his old man… Impatient like his old man, cooks like his mother."

Caleb laughed. "Seriously?"

"Kid could murder with spaghetti. Raise those kids out of cans out of necessity. His mother… I wish I'd had a dog. Choked down too many burnt meals. Loved that woman but… man, oh man. Indigestion at 22. Floored me." John stepped back to watch Caleb work. "Loves like her. Just… wholly. Fully. Immediately. Come to think of it… he might have got that libido from his mother, too. She… Jesus. Thank God for birth control or else we'd've had a baseball team by the time I was 30."

"You don't talk much, John. Why so chatty about the old days all of a sudden?"

"Jim and I have been walking back through everything, looking for something. I'm hoping to remember something… anything that I wouldn't have known to look for at the time."

Caleb fell silent as his thoughts on the demon and John's special lists ran around in his head. "You say your wife was fertile?"

"Couple of false starts before Dean." John nodded, hands in his pockets. "One of them put her in a state. Women… anyway. Could've had more if we'd had a mind to it."

"That Stephens' woman pumped out three kids. I didn't find any grandkids aside from the one." Caleb looked to John. "How many kids did those families on your list have?"

"Usually two. At the least. Hardly any only children." John mused. "Goes back to that theory of Jim's. Biblical symmetry."

"You believe in that stuff?"

"Nah. No such thing as God. No such thing as the Devil. No Angels."

"But demons."

"Monsters need names."

After Caleb put all his tools away and they were waiting for the primer to dry, Caleb checked his messages. Nothing he was concerned about. Nothing to draw his attention. It was late into a poker game with a couple of hunter fellows that Caleb called over that John got the call. John needed assistance to put it on speakerphone but it was worth it. "Dean, that you son?"

"You son of a bitch! No such creature. I got the local village idiot calling me a retard!"

"Well, now you'll just have to haul ass back." John yelled over the laughter.

"What? Fuck you guys."

John put the phone back in his pocket and then killed the next seven hands. When all the buddies were gone and John was at the bottom of the bottle and Caleb was half in the next bottle, they were sitting on the porch and Caleb had the beginning of the fifth pack of cigarettes in his hands. Caleb couldn't hold it in, anymore. "You're kind of a dick."

"Right back at you." John tipped the bottle back into his mouth.

"Why? Why are you such an asshole?"

"Why'd you stop being an asshole?" John asked right back. "Look, son."

"You're not my father." Caleb cut him off.

"It's a term of endearment, kid. What happened to your folks, anyway?"

"Car wreck when I was 17." Caleb kneaded his temple with his fist. Could you get a hangover while you were still drinking?

"Fair enough. So… you fucked my ex. She ran off on you. It's what she does…"

"I didn't run her off." Caleb jabbed his finger at him.

"Whatever. She runs away, she comes back, she runs away, she comes back."

"What are you doing? Who are you even talking about? Did you even know her?" Caleb burst out. "You sent your kid on a snipe hunt. You ran your other one off. You had a woman who loved you and you let her go without a fight. What is wrong with you?"

"If I had known you were going to lay your filthy hands on her, I wouldn't have let her go."

"Me? Filthy hands. Do you know what you did to her? Do you?" Caleb sucked in a lungful of smoke and almost choked exhaling it.

"Why are we talking about fucking Claire? Crazy ex-girlfriend Claire. We should be trying to figure out if she's fucking Bobby now."

"You're such a fucking dick."

"Grow up, Caleb. She ran off on you. That's an answer to a question you probably didn't ask."

"How in the hell do you manage to ruin other people's relationships? Huh? I'm curious. I tried to ask her what was so fucking wonderful about your dick but she couldn't give me a straight answer. And you know what? I no longer care. Maybe you got some Clydesdale in you. Maybe you have the roadmap to the G-spot. Maybe your spunk is more addictive than cocaine. I don't give a shit. You and Claire are over." Caleb stood up and almost fell over. "We were just starting and you, you son of a bitch… your life just bleeds out everywhere into everyone else's and you don't give a shit who's destroyed in the process."

"What in the hell are you talking about?" John watched him.

"I'm just saying that maybe you should have let her go that first time." Caleb didn't even know what he was saying anymore. How long had it been since she left? Too long. Just too fucking long.

"How many times has she been out here?"

"Enough times."

"She took you with her on that hunt…"

"The hunt came up when we were paying respects to her kid. First time she'd been able to get all the way to his grave."

"Huh." John grunted.

"Go… meet up with Dean. I'll get the truck finished and leave it here for you."

"Caleb…"

"Just… I need space." Caleb wandered out to the shed without even a flashlight. He finished the first coat before returning to the house. He found it empty and most of the mess in the kitchen cleaned. He tried to get some stuff down around the house but he was restless.

Caleb ran into Alan at the grocery store when he was restocking. He turned tail and ran. He went hunting for anything he could get his hands on. Just hunt after hunt for weeks. He was getting trashed in a bar outside of Pacoima when he saw her. She was at the entrance with a folder. She was talking and laughing and then she was inside the bar, waving at whoever through the window. When she saw him, she looked ready to run. She sat next to him at the bar. "You following me?"

"I got a hunt in town." He shook his head. "Werewolf."

"It's dead. I got it last night." She told him. "I just saw Dean Winchester outside. Sent him off to do a poltergeist for me."

"John with him?"

"Not that I could tell." She shook her head. She waved to the waitress who was wandering around with a plate of nachos. The plate landed in front of Claire. She picked at it for a minute. "Sorry, I didn't check in."

"You're free to go wherever you want."

"You know what I mean."

"I don't."

"I was gonna come back. I did and you were gone."

"I've been hunting." He shrugged and swallowed down half his beer. "You want a drink?"

"No." She shook her head. She grunted and put down the chip she was about to put in her mouth. Hand went to her belly and her face went a bit green.

"You okay?"

"Fine." She kept her eyes on her plate but grabbed his hand and placed it on her stomach.

Caleb stared at her for a long moment until he felt the swift kick under his hand. "What the fuck?"

"I was going to tell you but I wanted to do it in person." She looked at him. "A fucking poltergeist told me."

"It's mine?"

"Yeah." She nodded. "Near as I can tell… it was that week we spent naked."

Caleb vision started to fade in and out. "I…"

"I know… I kind of freaked when I found out." She tried once more to eat. "This kid likes nachos."

"What?" Caleb sighed. "We'll have to fix that. That kid needs a steak."

"Ugh. No. It hates steak and that makes me sad." She watched his face carefully. "You ok?"

"No… but…" He met her eyes. "You really went to see me?"

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"Why?" She stared at him, her eyes filled with water. "I wanted you to know… I wanted… to see if you wanted to meet this child. I wanted to be near you. I miss you."

Caleb kissed her mouth, gently. "I missed you, too."

"Take me home?"

"You want to call my place home?"

"Yes. I do… but after I finish these nachos. Kid is hungry tonight."

So Caleb went home and opened the house up. She met him there a day later and fell into his bed to sleep for two days. When she woke, she ate everything in sight and sat with her belly out whenever she could. All of her clothes still fit but she liked to touch her belly and he liked to have it available for touching when he walked past. It took a couple of weeks to come to terms with their new life. No more drinking for Claire. No more partying for Caleb. Late at night, they read that baby book together. Caleb started cleaning out one of the rooms to use as a nursery.

Claire did the shopping and most of it was crap. Caleb had to go back for things, often. She wanted to train and he didn't want her near any danger. She hustled, he kept watch. They slept together and often after exhausting themselves. Caleb tried not to hunt much but it didn't keep him from studying. Or people from calling. He closed himself up in the basement to take those calls. Then he decided it was all too close to home and rented out a basement apartment in town to make deals and stash the heftier of his hunting volumes. They got into a fight about that.

"I'm pregnant. Not infirmed." She hit a box full of books. "I'm a hunter, too."

"I just…" He looked around his house. "It invites things. I'm only moving the things that would put us in danger. It's not about you. It's about our kid."

"So… shouldn't I have a say?"

"Yeah… I just… Just the heavy stuff." He picked up the box and loaded it in the trunk. He was unloading it at the apartment when his cell phone rang. He answered without looking. "Claire, I'm not going to fight with you about this. It's done. I'll be home in like an hour."

"Trouble on the homefront?"

"John." Caleb sat. "Hey."

"Jim and I were talking. I wanted your opinion."

"What about?"

"It's… the children. You think it's… Jim says… I don't know anymore."

Caleb got the box inside and leaned on a wall while he thought about it. "Okay. Say… something was done. What?"

"There was blood on the blanket. Don't know whose. Let's say it was the demon. He fed my boy his blood. To do what?"

"I'm still thinking army, man."

"But, if they're eliminating competition… is it really an army?"

Caleb took some measurements and scribbled some numbers while it kicked the idea over for the hundredth time. "Okay… so like… nearly everyone can get into the army, you just gotta enlist. They find out you have special skills and you get promoted, right?"

"It's the way it worked for me."

"When I was in school, the JROTC kids would enlist and they would become like… officers. I hear that West Point guys get even higher than that."

"Yeah. Commissioned officers."

"Okay. So, say these kids, they got some of the demon juice. They're special but how special?"

"Don't know. I mean… Sam's smart but so was his mother. And he's athletic but so am I and you've seen Dean go at it."

"Well…" Caleb thought about Claire and her son. "Claire was an airman, her son's father was in the Navy. That's some good stuff, just naturally. Maybe if the bloodline is right and the genetics… you know… Laila Ali wins boxing matches. You know that training is a big part of it but talent came from her old man." The wheels just started going. "So if you saw the daughter of Mohammed Ali just sitting around making babies… sure why not… but if you knew she had the gift her father had… you'd want her to use it."

"So, if I were a demon and I gave all these children my blood. Then I saw that one of my… special kids was sitting around eating potato chips and playing video games… instead of going out and fighting in a war… maybe…"

"Maybe."

"I might regret eliminating that uselessness if I had known they'd breed up with a soldier, a hunter."

"Right."

"What I don't get is that some of these kids…. No fires. Enough of them did that… I found a lot of 'em. Not all."

"You get any of the stories?" Caleb sat down.

"A couple. Whichever parent survived was asleep or working late when the fire started. Kids just barely got out alive."

"You think there were any where the kids didn't make it either?"

"I'm starting to think that maybe there were… like… it was the first test."

"First test?"

"Yeah. Jim and I are going to get deep… I have some theories and you've helped me along." John breathed for a moment. "So, she came back to you?"

"Yeah, she did."

"Well, enjoy it while it lasts."

"Shut up, John." Caleb rubbed at his scalp. "Look… um… just stay away. She did come back. And she's pregnant. And I'm going to keep her safe."

"Wait, what?" Caleb could almost hear John's teeth grinding together.

"You didn't want her. I did. She's gonna have my kid and I don't want that son of a bitch that you're hunting anywhere near her. I'm getting a new place set up for hunting and guns. Don't come back out to the house."

"Caleb."

"I'm not saying I won't help. You know I will. I just… I got a family to look after, now."

"I hear you. Congratulations, Caleb. You take care of her."

"If she lets me."

"Well, she's like that."

"I guess."

"Caleb… I'm gonna figure this out. I'll call you if I really need something but… don't be afraid to raise that kid right. If Claire is sticking around, don't be afraid to love her. She's a good woman, she'll do you right."

"Yeah. I know." Caleb sighed. "Hey… I'll leave some stuff here for you. I'll text you the address."

"I appreciate it."

* * *

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 8

Caleb's body hummed through the whole pregnancy. While hunting, while studying, while sleeping, while fucking his knockout of a pregnant girlfriend, while eating, while waiting for ultrasound results. He did try to put healthy food in her body but she and the baby preferred crap. Nachos and hot dogs and twinkies. She just laughed at him when he couldn't figure it out.

"I dream of nachos and hot dogs and twinkies, babe." Claire rubbed her belly, it looked enormous but she was only halfway there. "I would eat them always except that my thighs and my ass would swell to unsightly dimensions."

"You are such a salad girl, though."

"So that I can have my twinkies." She kissed his puzzled face. "When I first came off the meds after the pixies. I was so hungry all the time. I must have put on like 20 pounds because John never ate anything but burgers and pizza. My main motivation for hustling was to have my own money so I could have a salad every once in a while."

Caleb knelt and held her belly in his hands. "You know. I get… riled up when you mention him but if it wasn't for him… you wouldn't be here."

"If it wasn't for that damned possessed man… I wouldn't have been there for John to save." She looked down at him. "We could do this all night. I wouldn't be here if I didn't want to be." She stared at his bald head. "If I had really wanted to fight for it, I could still be with him… wearing him out every night so he could barely hunt."

Caleb laughed, "like you do to me.?"

"It was easier with him. He was older."

"What does that mean?"

"That you were kind of right. He was old for me. Our… libidos didn't match. I could take him down for the count and still want to play." She ran her finger over his receding hairline. "You go down for the count and I'm down, too. Every time." She kissed his head though it was awkward with her belly in the way. "I love that so much."

He looked up at her and she had a strange expression on her face. He kissed her belly and nudged her legs. "What's up?"

"Just… trying to find a scenario where I could have met you some other way."

"Sh…" He stood and pulled her to her feet. "Come on. It's time to go."

The ride was quiet. The waiting room was quiet. Then the tech was squirting lubricant on her belly. The wand ran this way and that and then the question. "So, Mom, Dad. Are you ready to find out what we got in here?"

"Does it have a tail?" Caleb blurted out. Claire hit him. "I was joking."

"No tail." The tech gave them a smile.

"Is it a boy?" Claire asked, ribbing him again.

"It's a girl." Caleb glanced at the monitor.

"Done this before?" The tech asked as she began cleaning the mess.

"Second time for both of us…" Claire looked up at him. "We're both on our third lives."

"Just six more." He winked at her.

They were quiet until the doctor came back. Everything was fine. She was chided on her diet after Caleb gave away her twinkie routine. She looked at the two of them. "You're both very excited. Sleep now while you can. That baby will be here in four months."

On the way home, they got takeout. A mountain of lo mein noodles for the mother-to-be. Then Claire spent a long time reading through the name book with a highlighter and dental floss as bookmarks.

Caleb worked on designing the baby furniture and looked through samples for girl colors. She laughed at him. "We are not going to have a hydraulic changing table."

"You might not be able to live without it once you see it."

"We'll see."

Halfway through the mountain of lo mein, Caleb had to run into town for fruit. Just that. So, as he was standing in the produce isle, he realized he'd forgotten to get her to specify what fruit. So he had a couple of pieces of everything he could find. Then he was putting melons in his cart. Watermelon, honey dew, cantaloupe. Then he was staring at kiwi and not sure what to do.

"You making a salad, man?" Adrian had a kid in the cart and the other on his hip. "You look confused."

Caleb turned a bit. "She sent me for fruit. She didn't tell me what kind. She eats everything and she has a craving… I… she wasn't specific…"

"That blonde?" Adrian motioned with his hand toward the square.

"Yeah."

"Congratulations, man." Adrian looked over the basket. "They got this dip over here. There's a plain one and a chocolate one. Get one of each. More strawberries, though."

"Now, I just got to find the twinkies." Caleb raised his eyebrows. "I show up without those, even if they aren't on the list, and I'm sleeping on the couch."

"Good luck." Adrian clapped him on the shoulder. "My sister wouldn't want you to be alone. The folks miss you but don't."

"I know." He nodded and pushed the cart to find the twinkies. The drive home was weird. He hauled the bags to the kitchen table and started chopping. Claire wandered in and started picking through the mess. "Oh my God. I forgot about this stuff." She opened the dipping sauces and dipped her fingers in. "Thank you. Oh. Strawberries."

"I thought I'd throw the melons in the fridge for a day or so."

"Cold melon. Good idea." She kissed his face. "You are so good to me."

He chopped up a bunch of the fruit and handed it to her in a big bowl. Then he put away the leftovers and just stood in his kitchen for a long time. He took a walk and when he got back, she was sitting in front of the TV with the remains of her fruit in front of her. She motioned him closer. "Come on. This is hilarious. It's a show on the history of the werewolf myth."

Then he turned off the TV and got on his knees for more exhilarating entertainment. When she was limp and catching her breath, Caleb came up for air. He sat next to her and covered them both with a blanket. She stared at him for a long moment. "I got mine."

"It was all my pleasure." He shook his head at her. She kissed his face.

"You're weird."

"Possibly." He nodded.

"You sure…" She ran a hand down his arm.

"I just wanted to make you feel good." He shrugged. Then he took a breath. "I ran into Adrian in town."

"Did he give you a hard time about something? He's got no right." She started to get riled up.

"No, the opposite. But seeing him… telling about us and… Makes me sad."

"Oh baby." She snuggled up against him. "You want to hunt something?"

"Yes… but no."

"We should go out. To dinner. To dance. Somewhere. Bowling."

"Target shooting." He nodded to her. She nodded back.

"Target shooting." She agreed.

Caleb looked at the guns. Civilians. He looked at his buddy. His buddy shrugged. "Really?"

"I can't let a pregnant woman have at the good stuff, Caleb."

"She was in the Airforce. She flew guns bigger than you. Hell, she can handle anything in my personal stock."

He stared at them for a long moment and when he heard a door shut behind him, he started loading the cart with heavy artillery. "You go out. Far out. You got it? Old man knows I sent preggo out to full metal jacket, he'd kick my ass."

Caleb got the guns loaded and he loaded them on the mechanical arm for her. Once he was sure she had her stance down, he moved over to get his own gun loaded and his mind emptied for twenty minutes while he shot round after round into the target. Then his phone went off in his pocket. He had to hop back in the van to hear over the sound of gun blasts.

"Caleb. I need you." John Fucking Winchester.

"What you got?"

"I need help with this hunt but I got signs showing in more places than I can get to. I'm sending Dean off on his own… just… I won't be able to help him if he gets in over his head…"

"Oh, no. Yeah. I'll be his back up when he needs it."

"Thanks." John breathed heavily. "Could you meet me? I'm close by."

"I'm out at the range with Claire. Let me get her home, first."

"Alright. Two hours?"

"Yeah."

Caleb spent another twenty minutes shooting then they started dismantling the guns to return. Claire wanted lunch. They grabbed some boxes to go. Caleb inhaled what he could and left the remains for Claire. She kissed him hard on his way out. It started raining. Caleb picked up more food and was in the basement apartment shedding his soaked shirt when John came crashing down the stairs with a box of research. John stared at the bags on the table. Caleb motioned. "Dig in. Figured you'd be starving."

"Thanks." John shucked his jacket and set down his box. Burgers and fries.

"The fries are all yours, save me a burger though." Caleb murmured as he started going through John's research. "This has started…"

"It has. I don't know where they're going, though." John mumbled around his mouthful and took the fries with him to the table. "I'm afraid they're going to take Sammy, soon."

"To do what?"

"I don't know. It's just two or three off of my lists but they vanished without a trace."

Caleb sat and absently chewed on his burger. He read over John's notes. "You're not going to bring Dean in on this?"

"Eventually, maybe." John shrugged. "That kid… I put so much on him already."

"He can take it. He's a good kid, John."

"I've been putting it on him since he was four." John pointed out. "That kid… takes care of me and his brother… Took care of Claire when she was with us." John cleared his throat. "How is she doing?"

"Healthy. We're almost there." Caleb shoved his burger into his mouth.

"Maybe she'll sit her ass down, now."

"I wouldn't count on it." Caleb shook his head. It was the thing in the back of his head. That little bit of doubt that was always there. That always grew when John was around.

"Could you make sure she has a place to be? I worry about her but… I worry less now that I know she's with you."

"John…"

"I just keep thinking… if she wanted to use you. She could have tried to pass off your kid as mine. I think she's got the crazy in her to do that if that's what she wanted. I don't know what I would have done. Probably nothing good. She didn't do that."

"She almost didn't tell me because of what I did with that possessed man who killed her kid."

"Missouri told me the whole story finally." That was the closest that he was gonna get to that apology.

"I think… she… needed to hear that. You don't need to worry about her anymore. She's not hunting now. She wants to make sure our daughter is safe."

"A girl?"

"Yeah. Yeah. We found out the other day." Caleb nodded. "Excited."

"I always wished Mary could have had a daughter." He sighed. "I wouldn't have known how to raise one. Raising boys is hard enough."

"So, what's Dean got?"

"New Orleans. Poltergeists. Ought to keep him busy for a while."

"That it will." Caleb laughed.

Caleb went home to pick up his favorite guns. He gave instructions about plants and breakers and she followed him out to the porch and he wished she hadn't. John was waiting in the driveway. He just hoped the rain kept her from seeing who was in the truck. She kissed his mouth and waited on the porch until they were down the drive. Caleb watched the side view as she wandered back inside.

"Well, she ain't going hungry." John grunted.

"Hot dogs and twinkies all the damn time." Caleb shook his head. "She ate a chicken fried steak bigger than my head and didn't break a sweat."

"Pregnant women will do that."

Caleb didn't know what he was doing except John had always been his friend and he missed that feeling being able to talk to someone about changes in life. "I'm kind of freaking out."

"If you want out. Tell her. She raised a kid alone before. She'll do it again."

"I don't want out."

"You're sorry you're not married. You're sorry that you lied about who you were hunting with. You're sorry that you could die on a hunt and your daughter doesn't have a father."

"And I'm sorry that I always feel like I want to punch you in the face… wait. Not sorry about that."

"Comes with the territory." John nodded. "Through everything… The last couple of years… People have told me that despite what people felt about me… Everyone loves Dean. Everyone loves Sam. I know that everyone wants to take care of Claire. I might not be worth much but somehow… I brought them into this life. I brought people into this life that I felt should be shielded from it. I taught them how to fight it and they do it so much better than I do."

"Not sure they would agree with that."

"Talk to me again when your daughter is Sam's age and you don't know what you're going to do to keep her safe if she's running away."

"Well, that's not going to happen. She's going to be cryogenically frozen at age five."

"Good luck with that." John got the truck on the freeway. "I would have frozen Dean at… eight… and Sammy at two."

"Why?"

"Dean was… um… just coming into himself. Taking care of Sammy and learning to shoot and hunt and he was having a blast with it. Eager to learn and just… good at everything. That age where he didn't question if he could. He just did. It's amazing when you can teach them at that age. If you wait too long, they doubt." John watched the rain pelt the windshield. "Sammy couldn't talk at two. Just a lump of chub. Fucking cute and he hadn't figured out how to hate me yet."

"He doesn't hate you."

"But he learned how to say it." John nodded to himself. "And then he just couldn't stop saying it."

It was a long week of dirty motels, sketchy interviews, dusty tomes and musty tombs. Caleb dragged his bones out of the crypt and collapsed in the truck and waited for John to show up and get him home. He hauled out his phone. He called to check in. Claire was out hustling and he could barely hear her. She sounded happy. He promised to be home soon. John climbed in the truck and they were off for a motel to spend the night. When Caleb woke in the morning, the sun was just coming up. John was still awake. "You slept through the night. When did that start?"

"Claire." Caleb shrugged and got his ass up to take a piss. "If you fuck all day, you gotta sleep all night and vice versa."

Dressed, he got his bones out to gather his things. John sighed. "You're ditching me."

"We're not making any progress and that baby… I gotta be there. John… if she goes into early labor or something happens and I'm not there…"

"Okay." John nodded. "You'll be fine. Caleb. You'll be a fine dad."

* * *

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 9

When Caleb got home, he found a new routine. He got them up and they ate and they worked out a bit, then he was off to the apartment in town to study the files John had left with him. Old books shipped in from around the world. Rumors of old factions of historians who dealt in these things but he couldn't find any of them.

He was always home with some takeout, usually prompted by a text. Then it was home to eat and play with his girlfriend. He didn't ask what she did with her day. She volunteered this or that. They worked on the baby furniture together. Sex was still good but getting more awkward to perform every day. Claire made him go to bed with her every night. Even if they didn't have sex, they held each other. Sometimes she hummed. Sometimes he talked about whatever new thing he learned. Sometimes they talked to her belly. Caleb always felt weird about that. Claire could talk to her belly all day and he suspected that sometimes she did.

Claire had a different routine. When Caleb left for his "office" she went into town for walks and newspapers. She poured over them for hours. Putting hunts together, looking for patterns. She kept folders with her own filing system in the parlor where Caleb used to keep some guns. When she got one, she called Dean and faxed him the articles. They exchanged few words on the phone. She made lists of names. For the baby. For her research on the spirit who killed her son. For a reason to keep moving forward with the life she thought she'd chosen.

She liked the house. She loved Caleb. She was restless. Too big to hunt, too energetic to sit still. Picking little fights to get a rise out of him. Using her wiles to make sure he was still hers. Sometimes that hot and horny look he always gave her was too much but he didn't push. He was excited. He wanted her baby as much as she did.

Lamaze classes. They were behind. Caleb hated them but attended dutifully. Chain smoked afterward. Then they got down to the due date. T minus 14 days. Claire was miserable. She couldn't sleep. Caleb stayed up with her, rubbed her back. They paced together. Rigged furniture to be more comfortable. Claire was starving and the heartburn just about killed her. The pee breaks were so frequent, sometimes she drank water while sitting on the toilet. Contractions were false hope to the end.

Caleb kissed her head and rubbed her back and hummed some song he'd heard earlier. Claire rocked with him, her belly tightening every couple of hours. "She's going to come early."

"You think?" He asked.

"I'm pretty sure. Maybe by next week." She leaned back into his arms. "Maybe I can sleep now."

"It's almost dawn."

"Too bad. Sleep." She ordered. They dozed until the next contraction woke her up.

Caleb sleepily massaged her belly and started talking. "You know… before you showed up with him that time. I only slept around this time. I stayed awake all night… watching for monsters. I only slept after I was sure the sun was coming up."

"Why?"

"You don't want to hear the details but… I was asleep when she was taken from me. I woke up and she was gone. We didn't live together but sometimes she'd stay with me. She usually woke me up before she left, even if it was early." He didn't stop massaging as he spoke. "I figured she was up to pee or something and she heard a noise… stepped outside to check it out and that's when he grabbed her."

"What was it?"

"Possessed man. Spirit was… trying for something, we think. Jefferson's a friend. He… uh… had tracked it over years and states and it was the first time the girl died." Caleb kissed her neck and leaned into her as she leaned back. "The other girls turned up pregnant later. Jefferson was still trying to figure out the end game. Then came my girlfriend and everything matched his pattern, except she died."

"Caleb…"

"Took me two weeks to track down the man who had done it. Jefferson and I met over his dying body. That's when he told me the truth about the dark and what lives in it. Just this one thing with my girlfriend alone. I didn't sleep for that whole two weeks. Then I learned what had really happened and I vowed never to sleep in the dark again. I filled my nights with studying the books he left me. Calling the folks he sent me to. Learning everything I could."

"So you could beat it back."

"Then I met you. It took me a long time to figure it out but… when I laid eyes on you… I didn't want to be a person who stood guard in the night. I wanted to be the kind of person who had a normal life. Who had a girl on his arm who didn't know about it… Every time I looked at you… I just thought… she needs a man who's not afraid of the dark things."

"I never thought you were scared of dark things."

"I am. I… uh… started staying out on the porch until late. Started sleeping a little earlier. Never even used to hang out in the shed very late unless I was armed. I do what I need to… in the dark… but never unless I had to. You cured me."

"I did." She laughed. Then she remembered that first time with Caleb in the yard. When his eyes wouldn't leave her for a second. She hadn't even given it a thought.

"I never thought you'd come back. I never thought we'd be doing this."

"Well, me either. You were such a jerk when we met." She leaned back to kiss his mouth. "But I think I always knew it was just a show."

The contraction passed and they lay back down to doze in the morning light. Caleb woke to Claire molesting him. He stilled her hands and looked at her. "What are you doing?"

"I'm tired. We're having sex and hoping it speeds things up. I can't do this for another week and a half."

Caleb held her in his arms. She was so small. Her eyes were closed and he was dying to see if she was the exact copy of her mother. He had to hand her over for cleaning but he took her right back. They were still working on Claire but she was bitching them out so he knew she was okay. Then he had to hand her back over to the nurse to transport them all to Claire's hospital room. She held the baby against her chest until they both fell asleep.

Caleb kept watch on them both until the baby woke up. He picked her up and gently woke Claire. The nurses came in and there was a lot of to do to make sure Claire could breastfeed. She kept reminding the nurse that she had done it before. Then it was just the three of them in the room. Caleb stared at them. Claire shut her eyes for a bit. "You're staring."

"I… can't tear my eyes away."

"I can't wait to do this at home." She sighed. Then she watched Caleb walk the floor with their baby. He was so careful. "I was thinking about naming her Erica."

"Erica." He tried to get a look at his baby's face. "How about it, girlie? Are you an Erica?" Her eyes opened and Caleb felt something unclench in his chest. He didn't know what he thought he was going to see but those baby blues caused such relief. "Erica's got my eyes."

"What?" Claire sat up. "Let me see."

"Here you go." Caleb transferred her over.

"Oh, baby." Claire kissed her daughter's head. "You got your daddy's pretty eyes."

"Hey… uh… We should have talked about this before." Caleb leaned on the chair next to the bed. "I want to go to Jim. Have him bless us."

"Sure." She nodded. "Who do you think she looks like?"

"Just like you. She's beautiful." Caleb kissed her head.

Two days later, Caleb was mainlining coffee as he did laundry and tried to get something resembling a meal put together. Claire was nursing for the millionth time. When he had the oven going and the clothes in the dryer, he went up and slid into bed with the two of them. Claire couldn't stop staring at her. He nuzzled her neck as he settled in. "You think she's going to disappear?"

"Kind of." She touched the tiny nose. "I just want to look at her forever."

"You need to get some sleep." He reminded her.

"I will. I just… want to look a few more minutes."

The phone rang and Caleb had to get up to get it. He kept his eyes on his girls while he did so. "Caleb, talk to me."

"Hey um… It's Sam Winchester and…"

"Heya Sam." Caleb grinned. "What's going on?"

"You remember me?"

"I do." Caleb chuckled and wondered what those guys were up to. "How long you been buried in those books that you'd think I'd forget?"

"Long enough, I guess… uh… Dean and I are looking for our dad."

"He ain't with you boys?" Caleb sat up, remembering his last conversation with John.

"No." Sam breathed into the phone. "Dad was in California last we heard from him. We just thought… He comes to you for 'mutions… maybe you've seen him in the last few weeks.

"Nah, man. It's been a few months at least. He was still with Dean when I talked to him last… or Dean was going to New Orleans or something…"

"Just call us if you hear anything."

"Kay."

"Thanks."

"You bet." Caleb hung up the phone.

"They okay?" Claire asked.

"John took off on them." He shrugged.

"You think he's okay?"

"He's John Winchester. He's fine." He crawled back into bed. "How are my ladies? Hungry?"

"Yes. She eats so much." Claire kissed his face. "Come on. Let's get our grub down before she wakes up."

After Claire was fed and back in bed to nap until Erica woke up, Caleb took himself to town to check the answering machines he set up. Nothing from John. Ran through the mail and checked a few searches he'd set up. Nothing of note. Then Caleb hit up the store for a flower and some cider. Claire stuck the flower in her hair and shared some cider with him. They got in their snuggle time before Erica got hungry again.

Claire obsessed over dressing the poor baby up. Caleb took the girl outside to walk the perimeter whenever he could. She got deep under his skin so fast. By three weeks old, she was so entrenched in his soul that he did all the things he swore he'd never do; explain to everyone how advanced his daughter was though she was just doing what babies did, eat sleep and poop. Then they made the trip to see Jim.

Caleb kept his eyes on the rearview and the carrier while he let Claire sleep. She had reclined the seat all the way back so she could have a hand on the carrier. Her knee rested on his thigh. He felt very full and content through that whole drive. Erica slept most of the way but threw a tantrum to make up for it as they were hitting Blue Earth. She was screaming her head off when they pulled into the driveway. Claire got her changed and fed and calmed to huffs and puffs when they finally left the vehicle to greet the pastor who had been sitting on the porch the whole while. Graying and mustachioed, the pastor looked tired and had a fresh bandage on his wrist. He smiled and rose slowly to meet his guests. "So good to see the two of you."

"Hey Jim." Caleb hugged the man.

"Pastor." Claire smiled at him while she rubbed her daughter's back.

"Darlene. I mean… Claire." He greeted mother and daughter. "Well, I see we have a story to hear. Best go inside and get some lemonade and maybe some place to lay out that baby."

"She doesn't really lay out." Caleb looked to Claire.

"She might. I imagine that carrier isn't the best place to sleep for four hours." Claire kissed Erica's head and then Caleb's face as she passed him to enter behind Jim.

Claire watched the pastor move around. "How do you know about cooped up babies?"

Jim smiled and set glasses on the table and a kitchen towel near to Claire as she adjusted Erica in her arms. "Once upon a time, a man with two children came to see me about my special talent." He gestured to his wrist. "Then he stayed a time or dozen after that. Sam Winchester did not like his car seat much."

"I never met Sam." Claire shook her head.

"You may, soon. Dean's got Sam. They've been roving around looking for John." Caleb shrugged at the look on her face.

"They called here, too." Jim nodded. "John's been in touch. He's… busy."

Caleb nodded to the pastor and then looked to his girlfriend. "So have we."

"I see." Jim nodded. He looked apologetic as he asked. "Does he know?"

"No." Claire shook her head. Caleb met the pastor's eyes for a moment and the older man let it go. "I haven't seen him since… well… before we made this little girl." She turned her attention to her daughter who was busy trying to root her face into her mother's blouse.

"I suppose I'm to bless this child… shall I bless this union as well?"

Caleb winced and glanced at Claire. She shrugged. "We hadn't discussed that, Jim."

"Ah. Well. When you are ready, I will be here. You've had a long drive. Go, wash up. You remember where everything is."

"Yes." Claire nodded and got up. Caleb took the baby from her and shooed her away. Erica immediately nuzzled her face into Caleb's chest.

Jim watched the young man for a long while. "So, that story."

"There's not a whole lot to tell, Jim. Claire came to see me after they broke it off. We became friends. I got her set up to hunt on her own and she came back to me. John does know. He doesn't want me talking about him to her." Caleb took a breath and voiced his innermost fear. "I've heard enough people tell me she'd run back to him if she knew he'd had half a thought about making a go with her."

"They're all mistaken." Jim told him. "John… enjoyed her company. She wouldn't have let him go at all if she thought there was a chance. He didn't give her hope for one."

"You do know that he chased her all over the Midwest when she tried to get away from him, right?"

"I didn't say he didn't miss her. He just knew he wasn't the one for her." Jim poured them both a scotch and took a breath. "She looks happy. Happier than I've seen her before. You did that. Not John or the hope of John. His heart died 22 years ago. I'd liken it to being able to run a race in all it takes. Measuring your breath, the distance, reserving your energy to make the long haul, knowing where the finish line is and knowing you'll never get there for any reason other than running across that line doesn't mean anything so you just run in any other direction."

"You said she looks happy?"

"Yes. Very. Maybe that's you. Maybe I see you happy for the first time ever since I met you. I remember that wreck who came to see me. Who wanted to ask me a question and then walked out without finding out the answer." Jim breathed. "She's beautiful. Erica."

"When she was born… I just wanted her to be 100 percent Claire. Just… every inch. Then she opened her eyes for the first time and her eyes were blue… like mine." Caleb took a breath and admitted for the first time his deepest fear about Erica. "John even let me believe for a second that it was possible she wasn't mine."

"I don't know what to make of this fight between the two of you. John doesn't normally do this…" Jim swallowed his scotch and sipped his lemonade. "He reserves this kind of… assault for those who have crossed those lines we draw for ourselves. If you had wronged him or his boys, I'd say… "well, there it is" but…"

"Fuck me." Caleb breathed out. He'd figured it out. "Sam came to see me on his way to school. He stayed for a week. We just… shot the shit and he fixed me up with some software and I bought some weapons off him. I think I forgot and sold John one of his own guns back to him. Explains why he never paid up."

"Well, there you go. Bet he even forgot why he was mad at you. The man knows how to carry a grudge."

"Yeah." Caleb breathed. "We're getting along. We… match."

"Oh?"

"I didn't think we would. The way she was raised and all. I always feel like I'm going to get her dirty. After… that thing with her son… She let it go, I think. She's… settled into… herself. Her new self."

"This life does change people. Look at you. Maybe you were never like her but you weren't this. You were in college. You were engaged. Then you were scared and you were a hunter. Now… you're different. You're a hunter and you're a father and you're a lover and a good friend. You've been away too long."

"I guess so."

Caleb had just wanted a quick blessing but Claire came out with a baptismal gown and took a thousand pictures. Erica was cranky but didn't freak out when the water hit her head. Jim almost didn't give her back. "I'm going to raise her here. She can be my assistant."

"Nice try." Caleb took his daughter and tucked her into his own arms. "We got too much training to do."

"I was thinking… gymnastics." Claire gasped as they left the chapel. "I did cheer and JROTC in school. Helped a lot with basic. I'm thinking we get her going when she's small and she'll be ready for anything."

"You don't want her to go to school?"

"Yeah but… I want her ready. Oh. We have to put that gown away immediately. Before she spits up on it." Claire took a few more pictures and then rushed the girl upstairs to change her.

"You see there. She is still the woman her parents' raised. The dark hasn't killed that woman. Just like you… You are still the son your parents raised and you are both going to pass those things on to your daughter along with the knowledge of the dark that you have learned." Jim got them something to eat. "Her mother's compassion and her father's skill will make a hunter who is able to know the true spectrum of what we do."

Caleb was getting the coffee going when his phone rang. "Go for Caleb."

"Hey, uh… It's Sam Winchester."

"Hey Sam. What's going on?"

"It's… I've tried getting a hold of my dad and um… still can't get him. I'm just… trying everyone. It's Dean."

"What's wrong with Dean?" Caleb took a seat and motioned Claire and Jim to stay where they were. The baby was asleep next to the table.

"He's sick… well… injured and the docs are telling me that… he's got… weeks. Maybe."

"Calm down. Tell me what happened."

"I just… if you know of something we could do. Docs do not give us any hope… He's my brother man. I can't… And Dad is not fucking…"

"I got you. I hear you, Sam. Tell me what happened to your brother." Caleb listened as Sam relayed the story. Rawhead, electrocution and a matter of days to live. "You left your dad a message?"

"God damn it! I called him and he… we can't find him. We've been looking for him. His voicemail tells everyone to call Dean which does no one any fucking good because Dean is dying!"

"Sh." Caleb took a breath. "Calm down. Okay. Let me see what I can come up with. Okay? We're not giving up on your bro." He took a breath and looked to Jim who motioned with his hand to his hair. Hair. "Joshua. You got his number?"

"Joshua. Joshua." Sam whispered to himself. "Yeah. Yeah."

"Call him. This is his arena. There's any hoodoo, mojo, faith healer… Joshua knows the real deal."

"Kay. Thanks. If you hear from my dad…"

"Got it. I'll make him call you." Caleb hung up and looked over at her. He kissed her face. "He'll be okay. Joshua knows his stuff."

Jim had his hands clasped together, praying before he pulled out his phone and left the room. Claire looked after the man for a moment before turning her attention to Caleb. "He can't die. We didn't wrench our lives back from that damned Pixie for him to go down because of a rawhead."

"He won't." Caleb promised. "Joshua knows people. He knows the good from the bad."

"What the fuck is John thinking? These are his children." Claire cursed and went over to the cradle to watch her daughter sleep. "I thank God everyday that her eyes are blue."

"Why?" Caleb prompted, doubt creeping in again. John and his snide remarks.

"I'm sure we got all the Pixies but I don't want to take the chance. I fought that thing with every ounce of me and… I'm not weak. I never want her to have to go through that."

"He cares, Claire. He does. He's got his reasons."

"He better." She looked at him. "Dean's the… I don't doubt mine or your abilities but Dean is a hunter. If ever there was a person to have in this God forsaken life… It's Dean. He's so strong and sure. I can't imagine him having… weeks to live. And I absolutely cannot imagine John not answering for them or calling back after a message that one of his children is dying."

"I'm sure John has his reasons." Caleb cleared his throat.

"You won't. Promise me. Whatever the reason, it's never going to be good enough." She held his face. "Promise me that she always comes first."

"She does."

* * *

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 10

* * *

The days were long and the nights longer. The first big fight happened during one of those long nights. Caleb woke from a nap and they were gone. An hour later, Claire walked back in with Erica in her arms and she was smiling. Claire stared at him when she realized he was breathing hard. "We were chasing fireflies."

"How do you know they were fireflies?" His skin still itched with panic and he couldn't stand her smiling at him while the blood was rushing around his brain.

"Because they were. What else would they have been?" She shifted her weight from one foot from the other as she tried to read him but she hadn't seen this on him before.

"Could have been faerie light or will o' the wisp or …" His brain threw all sorts of supernatural creatures at his mouth that could make lights like fireflies.

"They were fireflies." She shoved passed him to put Erica in the cradle.

"You couldn't leave a note?"

"We were outside."

"Far enough out that I couldn't see you."

"Did you leave the porch?" She whirled on him, green eyes glittering with anger.

"That's not the point."

"If you had come around the side of the shed, you would have seen us."

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

"And have you stop me from taking my daughter out to play?"

"Our daughter."

"That's what I said."

"No, it isn't. You said she was your daughter. Like I don't matter."

"Why are you so mad?"

"I didn't know where you were!"

"We didn't go anywhere. We never go anywhere."

"You know what? Forget it." Caleb stormed away. He stomped down the basement and started hacking away at some packing foam. Claire fed Erica and he still hadn't come up when they both went down for the night. When she got up to change the baby, Caleb was gone. Basement was void of life and his shitty little car was gone.

Claire spent a week watching the doors. She went about her business and got Erica out and about but Caleb hadn't made an appearance in his own house. He stumbled in on Sunday with a week's worth of stubble everywhere and bandages on his arms. She slapped him across the face before she wrapped her arms around him. He smelled like a sewer but she wasn't about to let go.

Caleb got a look at her. "Where's my kid?"

"Taking a nap. You can't touch her until you shower."

"Okay." He nodded into his chest.

"Where did you go?"

"I was just going to the office for the night. I got swept up in a hunt. It was an emergency. I left everything here… I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry… we have half an hour to get you sanitized and for some grown up fun before she's awake."

"She's good?"

"I think she knew you were gone."

After a shower, shave and a tumble in the bed, Caleb got his daughter holding his hand as she tried to lock eyes with any object in view. She cooed the whole while. He got her fed and let her try to put his hand in her mouth while he explained what happened. "I was just going to get my head together because you were right… and I was going to come right back in the morning… I talked to Dean. He and Sam had stepped into some nasty business with someone trying to wrangle a daeva. I gave them what they needed and I was locking up when John pulled up. Said he was tracking a demon and he could use a hand. I went with, fully intending to call in the morning...

"So, John and I get to talking and I was telling him that I had just talked to Dean and telling him what was happening with their hunt. Then John gets a voicemail from Dean. He drops me off to handle this creature while he goes up to help with their hunt. I got in over my head." He gestured with his stitched up arms. "I got it, though."

"And what happened with the others?"

"John swung back by. He was tore up. I got him patched and the thing that was following him caught up to us and did a bit more damage but that's my wheelhouse. Daevas. He told me how he got away and at first light, we were gold. Then we went chasing the signs. I got caught up. Then beat up. We got some clues but not any damn closer. Then he dropped me off at the office this morning."

"Caleb…" She touched his smooth skin, rubbed at a scabbed over nick. "Why didn't you call?"

"At first… cause I was still mad. Then… we were so busy… I just didn't want to ruin myself worrying about you. Then I didn't want to get to talking about you in front of him because he always makes it about himself." He stared at her. "This is my story and I'm tired of him being in it."

"Okay." She nodded. "But you're okay?"

"I'm home and I got my girls. I'm okay."

"You tired?"

"No. Not a bit." He shook his head. "Me and the baby are gonna play. Can you get me something from town?"

"What do you want? Chicken fried steak?"

"Hmmm." He kissed her mouth. "And okra."

"And a vat of mashed potatoes."

"Sounds good." He nodded.

Claire took her time to breathe out the last of her panic that she hadn't burned in the bed with him. She got to the diner and placed the order. She picked up some twinkies and ate three while she waited at a red light. Ate two more on the road back to the house. She bought a pie off a stand along the way. She was composed when she made it back into the house and found both of them on the floor playing parachute with a sheet. Erica's giggles filled the air.

Claire set dinner out. They got Erica in a bassinet with a bottle. Claire ate some chicken while Caleb devoured his chicken fried steak. She picked at her green beans. Her eyes kept coming back to the cuts on his arms. Bandages over everything but he didn't seem to be in any pain. He seemed very calm. When night fell, he was weeding the yard. Weeding the yard in the dark.

Claire put Erica to bed with a bottle. She put protection symbols on the inside of the nursery door, along with a barrier of salt before going back downstairs to watch him some more. The more she watched him, the more she was sure and the more her horror had grown at the thought she'd left him alone with the baby while she'd gone to town. Her mind kept going back to Sebastien and that damned spirit. Kept going back to John's story about what might have been done to his Sammy.

She rigged the house; salt at the doors and windows, holy water in her pockets, gun on her belt. She couldn't find any books. Caleb had taken them all to his office. Her journal was buried under a pile of books in the study. Then she stilled. She and Caleb had made love after his shower. She didn't know anything. She felt so lost. Her world tilted and then she rushed downstairs to watch him as he began trying the doors. His eyes. Dark as pitch and wild. He was smiling.

Her hands found a phone. She started dialing but stopped. She couldn't do that. She couldn't call him here. She made a trap. Salted the foyer before she broke the line at the door and let him in. His mouth was harsh on hers. His hands hurt her as she struggled to finish what she'd started. She managed to break away and reconnect the salt line before leaping to safety in the kitchen. He talked fast and furious, using all kinds of words on her that were just enough truth to hurt and just enough wrong to fuel her fire as she ran through her paces with the exorcism. He shrieked when the holy water hit his flesh. She could hear the baby screaming and she'd have to push past him to get to the stairs but she made herself stay put and keep reading the words she'd written on the pages. When his head was thrown back and the scream seemed to be endless, she knew it was done but she still stared.

Caleb sobbed on the floor. Blood filled his bandages as if the wounds had just happened. There it was. The scabs on his arms had not looked right. When he lifted his blue eyes to her, Claire scooted to the salt line. Claire had to ask. "Did that thing do anything to our baby?"

He shook his head and looked up at the ceiling. She was still screaming. Claire leapt over him and ran up the stairs. The salt line was undisturbed. Erica was red-faced and her bottle was on the floor. Claire picked her up and calmed her down. She got her bottle and settled once more. Claire looked up when Caleb stood in the doorway. "She's okay."

"Claire…" Caleb stepped over the salt line. "I'm sorry."

"What did it want?"

"Erica." Caleb's eyes were on the ground.

"Why didn't it take her when I was in town?" Claire asked softly.

"I think it was waiting for something." He shook his head. "Maybe for someone to come… I…"

"How long?"

"When John and I fought off that Daeva… something got in. It rode me for days."

"Come on. Let's go to bed." Claire took them all to the bedroom. She got Caleb's arms stitched up properly and rebandaged. He was so quiet. She kissed his shoulders and held him but he wouldn't relax. "I should have known sooner."

"It was good. Real good. John didn't know and he… he's obsessive about his protections. Uses them even when he's just traveling around." Caleb took a breath. "Took all my strength to take off on him so it wouldn't learn too much about what he knows. I…"

"Caleb…" She gently laid her head on his shoulder.

"We just need to be careful. Vigilant." He told her. "It could still be coming. I don't know when."

"Then we shouldn't be here when it comes." She agreed.

"We can't roam around with a baby." He shook his head and turned his head to look at where their daughter slept on the bed. "She's still so little."

"We'll make it work."

"You…" Caleb shut his eyes. "You're gonna have to go without me. I need to call John and tell him what's happened. This… this could be it. It's gonna have to be now or never and I promised him I'd help."

"Okay." She nodded and cupped his face. "You're going to be okay. We're going to be okay. I'm gonna…"

"Don't tell me where you're going and do not go to see Sebastien. Go somewhere else. Don't go to any place you've ever been before. You got it? Until I call you."

"Okay." She nodded.

* * *

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 11

* * *

Caleb got a text message every other day with standard check-in info. No locations. Nothing other than "going to bed" or "checking in." He spent a lot of time at the office. He was knee deep in research for John. On the phone with John every other day. He'd taken to sleeping there as well. John had not taken the information well that he'd been host to a possessed Caleb for three days following the Daeva attack. Still, they were onto something. Seals. 666 seals but it wouldn't take near that many to unleash an unholy horde on the world. Just 66 and it would be all over. The most important of those would be the hardest to come by and Caleb didn't know how in the world a righteous soul went to hell in the first place.

The texts were old. They were in languages that made his head spin and it was slow going. So slow going. He had to pack up the lot to go to Jim's. He stopped at a payphone in Fort Dodge to check in with his girls. He could tell Claire wanted him to join her but she wouldn't ask. "Just stay safe."

"I will and you… you stay safe." Claire breathed into the phone. "You sure… it didn't do anything to her…"

"I'm sure." Caleb could still remember that thing hold his daughter with his hands, just terrified what it was going to do next. He just wondered what it had been waiting on. "How is she?"

"Not loving the time in the car but she's okay. She keeps looking around for you."

"I just hope this will all be over soon."

"Me too."

Caleb set the phone down and climbed back into the car. He got the books to Jim and waved off any questions about his girlfriend and daughter. "I just came to leave the books. I'm knee deep in this stuff and I'll get in over my head soon enough."

"What's wrong, son?"

"I'm running scared, if I'm honest. Managed to get myself possessed and I'm lucky I'm not burying the two of them right now." Caleb shifted from foot to foot. "It's all I can do not to go chasing after them but I made her promise not to tell me where she was going."

"Probably smart."

"I'm worried."

"She left loaded."

"Yeah, Made her take everything I could spare."

"She's smart and sure. She'll take care of your girl. You just… focus."

"I brought what I could. I need some codex you got. I can't remember the name." Caleb walked into the house and found the library. He picked it off the shelf and waved at the pastor on his way out.

It was late when he got home. The house was empty and it depressed him. Packing up some clothes, he jumped back in the car to get to his office. He sat up with the books and burned the lamps until the air turned pink. Then he collapsed into sleep on his cot.

When he woke, he got some oatmeal in his gut and back to the books. The better codexes helped. 600 seals, not 666. Too on the nose. Still that righteous man in hell business was troubling. Then he got to diagrams and figuring out how such a thing was possible. Book after book on Hell. Inferno and a stack of bibles… and he was close, he knew it. Selflessness would have to be the only way but how. Why?

It wouldn't be simple. No jumping in front of a bullet. No matyrism. That wouldn't lead a person to go to hell. Then he hauled out the trustee volume he'd been given by Pastor Jim years ago. Sins. There were sins. Seven deadly ones. There were commandments. There were venial sins, forgivable on all accounts. There were mortal sins… And a mighty list of them. As he was running through them, he felt like it was a lost cause to even consider. Most people would go to hell and that was just inside of the first nine. By the time he got to masturbation, he was very sure he was going to hell but he didn't feel like it was enough. A seal like this would most likely be broken already if that was the case.

"I'm doing this all wrong." He got up and splashed water on his face. "What does a man do to damn his soul without damaging it? What makes a man righteous but still able to condemn his soul? Not what a discouraged or evil soul does… what does a good soul do to … No good deed goes unpunished. Sure. Maybe. Road to hell is paved with good intentions… but that's a spiral…" He splashed more water on his face and paced. "No more idioms you idiot."

Caleb collapsed on his cot and hauled out his wallet. He didn't have a lot of pictures but he had some. His blonde girls. He would do anything for them. He would keep them safe. He would sell his soul to make sure they were okay. Every bad thing he'd done in his life, he'd done in the protection of others… mostly. That one dealer he'd capped in the ass had that coming. Fighting with John over a girl was just life. Killing a man to put him out of his misery… that was God's work… if one believed God gave a shit. Caleb was not sure the original Father of all was even paying attention.

Getting up, he did a few jumps and punched an invisible enemy before sitting down to his computer again and began his search anew. He had no idea how much time had passed, hours or days when his phone rang. He picked it up and stared at it. No idea who that number belonged to. A quick conversation later, he was out the door. He went directly to the morgue. The cops were waiting.

"I was a… student of Pastor Jim's." Caleb nodded to the cop. "His novice called me."

"I'm afraid I can't share details of the case with you." The cop shook his head. "Where were you 12 hours ago?"

"At home. In Nebraska."

"Had you spoken to the deceased recently?"

Caleb hauled out his phone. He ran through the history. "We spoke just the other day. I came to trade some books with him."

"Nothing bothering him? Did he seem scared?"

"No. Pastor Jim was a good man." Caleb motioned to the fridge. "Can I see him?"

"You can see him at the funeral."

"Fraid I can't. I… uh… I have business to attend to and I can't." Caleb walked over to the fridge and waited. After a long moment, the coroner opened it for him. It was Jim. Caleb was okay until he saw the man. Throat was cut. The smell was pungent. "You treat him with something?"

"No." The coroner shook his head.

"Smells like sulfur."

"Bodies sometimes pass gas after…"

Caleb motioned that he was done. Sulfur. He left and went directly the church. The cops were still crawling all over. The novice was nervous, wringing his hands and pacing. Caleb got the young man seated on a pew while Caleb got a look at what he could around everyone else. The smell was still in the air. He gathered a few items of Jim's from the novice and jumped back in his car. He stopped halfway to call John. He could hear the moisture in the older man's voice as he relayed the news. "There's another thing I've been thinking, John. I think that this… righteous man in hell thing… it's the thing. What could a righteous man do that was heinous and also not so damning to tarnish his soul?"

John didn't answer for a long time. "Righteous man does a righteous thing that lands him in hell."

"Yeah."

"You're a genius, Caleb."

"What did I figure out?"

"There's not a lot of things on that list. Course… no one would be dumb enough to do it."

"What's that?"

"Sell their soul. I mean… that act… not evil. Heinous. It's not evil."

"Wait…"

"It would depend on what a person soul their soul for." John cursed to himself. "I gotta tell the boys."

"Call me later. We'll spit ball some more."

"Yeah." John cleared his throat. "I got the gun. The gun."

"No shit."

"I'm gonna this thing. No one else. I swear it."

"Jim." Caleb sobbed.

"Jim." John repeated and hung up.

Caleb breathed through the next ten minutes as his eyes filled with wet that just wouldn't pour over. Then he was back on the road. He was back in his office by dinner. He was reorganizing based on his conversation with John. He thought about what could and would come after Jim. Had to be demon but inside the church would be high-level stuff. John had the Colt. No one had thought that thing really existed but it gave him hope. This could be beat. Caleb stared at his phone on the edge of the table. He opened it and took a long look at the last few texts from Claire. He sent one word to her. Hide. He didn't know what made him do it. He reset the phone to the factory defaults and tossed the phone on the cot. He couldn't let anything happen to them.

Tucking his wallet into his pack, he checked his barriers and set another pot to brew. When he turned there was a little blonde girl staring at him. She hit him in the head with one of his own guns and the lights went out. When he woke, he was tied. She stared at him. "You hunters. You just don't get it."

"Kill me. Don't care." Caleb shook his head.

"I'm going to. I need you to call John." The girl growled at him.

"Phone's right there." Caleb jerked his chin at the table.

"It's empty." She jabbed him with one of his own knives. "You all think John is doing such a great job but he can't beat us. We've got him beat."

"Sure, if you say so." His mind kept coming back to the fact that John had the gun.

"You've got a lot going on here." She flipped through his work. She lifted a sheet. Fuck. It had two works on it. The Colt. "That's cute."

"I need a new one."

"That's not what this means." She crumpled it up and laughed. "You think you can stop it? We're only getting started."

"John will."

"What's his number?" She backhanded him across the face. Her eyes were black. "I'm gonna kill everyone of you." She got in his face. "I'll start with that little girl you and John been fighting over. Where you got her stashed? She at the farmhouse? You got her headed to Jim's? Think I wouldn't backtrack?"

"I'll tell you." Caleb clenched his jaw. John could defend himself. The numbers rolled off his tongue. It wasn't John but maybe it would buy some time. She gagged him as she dialed.

"You just keep that mouth shut." She cleared her throat as the phone rang.

"Hello?" The voice came out of the phone.

"Sam?" She grinned.

"Who is this?"

"Think real hard. It will come to you." She licked her lips.

"Meg. Last time I saw you, you fell out of a window."

"Yeah, no thanks to you. That really hurt my feelings, by the way."

"Just your feelings? That was a seven-story drop."

"Let me speak to your Dad."

"My Dad. I don't know where my Dad is."

"It's time for the grownups to talk, Sam. Let me speak to him now."

"This is John."

"Howdy John. I'm Meg. I'm a friend of your boys. I'm also the one who watched Jim Murphy choke on his own blood… still there John-boy?"

"I'm Here."

"Well that was yesterday. Today, I'm in Lincoln. Visiting another old friend of yours. He wants to say hi."

She pulled the gag off and held the phone to Caleb's ear. "John, whatever you do don't give…"

She yanked the phone away and put her finger to her mouth. John's breath was harsh. "Caleb?" He breathed out. "You listen to me. He's got nothing to do with anything. You let him go."

"We know you have the colt, John."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Oh Okay. Listen to this."

Caleb didn't have a chance to react before the blade was cutting through his skin. He could hear John calling his name as it went dark.

* * *

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 12

* * *

Claire stared at the text message for a long moment. She looked at her daughter and around at their motel room. Arizona. It was hot already and she didn't know where else to go. She gathered up their meager belongings and headed north. She found a place in Seattle and just hunkered down for a week. She even tossed her phone. She and Erica learned to sit up and roll over all inside Washington state. Then they cruised through Utah. Then Claire did what she'd avoided for months. She made sure Erica was down for a nap and took their weary bones to a library to do some research. Newspapers. Red flags. Then she saw the article from Lincoln. She felt the cold rush through her body and she couldn't move. She put her hand on Erica's sleeping belly and cried in the silence of the library. Then she got up and found a payphone. She dialed the number and listened as a novice explained that Jim had been gone for over two months and the funeral had passed.

When the news finally sunk in, she was in Missouri and she couldn't bring herself to call anymore people. She almost did a dozen times. She had all the numbers pulled up to call John but she'd look at her daughter and turn the phone off altogether. Then they got routines down. They were in Georgia when Erica took her first steps and Claire finally let someone else take care of her daughter so she could take care of a werewolf. She did a few exorcisms in Florida. Built a name for herself as Erica started to say a few words. After Erica's first birthday and the 12th exorcism, of which only eight were real, they moved on.

In Texas, Claire spent two months in a city before moving on but she got Erica on real food and potty trained while there. She found La Llorona were real, chupacabras were not, and that cowboys came in two flavors and neither were bad boy enough for her. She fell in with a group of bikers in New Mexico and they helped her get her driving fund up and fixed her car while she put several of their brethren to eternal rest.

Eventually, Claire just got used to the life as it was. She drove from city to city with her little girl and she helped where she could. Hustled late into the night while her girl slept in one stranger's home or another. Claire bought Caleb a proper stone after Erica's third birthday. The visit to Lincoln was emotional and Erica didn't understand why she cried so much.

She'd learned a lot from the bikers. She opened a large storage unit in Lincoln. She located what she could of Caleb's things. She took her time going through them, erecting shelves to create her own system. She found some pictures of him to show their daughter. Erica didn't understand yet but she toddled around all afternoon with a picture of her father in her fist.

The "office" as it was had been emptied by the cops, according to the landlord. Claire had to do some fancy footwork to get that stuff back and even then, she knew it wasn't all of it. On her third week in town, she found herself in the grocery store with a hot and fussy toddler and face to face with Adrian and his kids. They blinked at each other. Hands on carts and babies milling about. Adrian cleared his throat. "I went out to the house when I found out about Caleb. Looked like no one had been there for a long time."

"I… took her to meet her brother. Caleb was working." She shrugged.

"I… Dad bought the house. It was still in…"

"Alana's name. I didn't know that." Claire took a breath. "We don't need it."

"Dad's kept it locked up. Someone broke in."

"That was me."

Adrian tilted his head at her. "Do you need the house?"

"No. This isn't our home. I couldn't. Not after." Claire shook her head. "I just wanted to check around for some things. We were on our way out of town."

"He'd… give it to you."

"I'm sure." She nodded to him and his children. "They're big."

"Growing like weeds." He offered a half a smile.

Claire took a breath. "I bought him a stone."

"Oh?"

"Yeah. We… I just needed to do something."

"Mom…"

"It was fine but… I needed… to…"

"Okay."

"Um… well. I should get her to bed." Claire pushed her cart on.

"Take care."

"You too." She nodded but didn't look back. She found the children's motrin and opened the bottle right there in the store. Her fussy girl didn't like that much. They made their escape into the night and in the storage unit, Claire sat up all night with her hand on a bottle of Jack and her eyes on the pictures she'd found of him.

In the morning, she got them packed up and a credit card set up for the storage unit. A musty flannel from Caleb's closet around her shoulders, she said goodbye to Lincoln. She kept driving until she had to find a clinic to take her daughter to. But she made sure it was far away. North Dakota. They stayed a month while Erica got better and while Claire took care of a few hauntings.

She blinked. She swore it was just a night's sleep and she was in Mississippi lighting the candles on Erica's 4th birthday cake. Erica danced all over the picnic table. Claire joined her then picked her up to blow out the candle. They celebrated with a day of shopping. First was the thrift store to get some basics and things she could get dirty in. Then was the department store for a couple of outfits that required ironing. Claire took a roll of pictures. Then they moved to New Hampshire.

Darlene made a reemergence after a BOLO was sent out on Claire Reid. It didn't seem to bother Erica much that her mother had changed names. She kept her mother busy with Why and Why and Why and Why. She also memorized the five books they kept in the car and recited them by memory over and over and over, forcing Claire to find a few more.

In Indiana, they celebrated Erica's fifth birthday and Claire registered with the state a home school program. She kept the curriculum sent to a PO. She decided she'd check it when necessary. That's when the articles started building a problem she couldn't take care of by herself. She collected what she could and decided it was time to leave Indiana. She had Erica packed up, the articles ready and she stared at her phone for a long time as she sat in the parking lot. She stared at the name and then scrolled up. It was late but she was sure no one in their life ever went to bed early. It rang a few times. Then a voice picked up. "This better be good."

"You got something better to do?" Claire couldn't resist.

"Who the-. Talk. Now."

"Calm down, Pixie Bait. It's just Claire."

"Who told you about the Pixies?"

"It's Claire, Dean. Darlene."

"Fuck me. How are you?" The change in his voice was a good indicator.

"Good and I got some intel for you."

"On what?"

"On something I'm not touching."

"Oh, come on. Can it be that bad?"

"You got an army of friends. I'm not doing this alone. I'll meet you."

"Yeah. Yeah. Text an address."

"It's Indiana."

"Oooh. Give me some clues and we can be there by morning."

"Alright."

Claire stayed up all night and watched her baby sleep in the backseat. When the sun was rising she heard the familiar sound of an old car. She got out to wait and they were still a block away. She tried not to show her disappointment when there were only two occupants and one of them wasn't the man she'd expected. There were two men and they conversed before Dean got out, all bow legs and gravel-faced. He looked like he hadn't eaten or slept in weeks. "You look awful."

"Thanks." He made a face at her. "Good to know I'm still so high on your to-do list." He smiled and gave her a wink.

"You were never on my to-do list." She met him in the middle of the lot in a hug. "Good to see you, Dean."

"It's great to see you!" He looked like it had exhausted him to dredge up the excitement in that statement.

"You look so much more grown up." She gave his arms a squeeze. Solid guns there. "How long has it been?"

"A few years." He grinned at her. "That must have been '05."

"About then." She nodded that it had to have been. Erica was born in '06. Then her eyes caught on the other man getting out of the car. Even taller than Dean and John. Just a string bean about a mile high. "Oh my God, is that Sam?"

"Yep. That's the little geek." Dean laughed and turned to his brother. "Dude, this is Claire Reid."

"Hi." Sam tilted his head at his brother and shrugged.

"Dude, we never told you about Claire Reid?" Dean blinked at his brother.

"Well, you know your dad never did." She leaned forward and shook Sam's hand. "You are much taller than your picture suggested."

"You knew Dad?" Sam's face did a thing that made her heart twist and want to give him a hug. Claire looked to Dean whose eyes were on his shoes.

"Yeah." She smiled and took a breath. Her mouth clicked shut and then she had to keep talking. "Yeah. I knew John and this guy. Deviant." She slugged Dean on the shoulder. "Where is John? I figured he'd come with."

"Shit." Dean cursed and his shoulders slumped. "No one told you?" She shook her head at him. "He's dead."

"When?" She touched the pearls at her neck. She'd slipped them on… just in case.

"'06."

"Shit." Her voice broke and she had to breathe as her eyes filled with tears. She had to keep breathing while she blinked her eyes clear. "I thought he was indestructible."

"I did, too." Dean shook his head. "No one really told you?"

"Who?" She racked her brain of people who would have told her but there was just Dean and Bobby left. "Dean, I only know a handful of hunters and really… after Caleb… I fell off the world." She glanced back at her car. Erica was still asleep, good.

"It was a few days… after Caleb." Dean stared at her. "You and Caleb, then?"

"He wasn't really a dick, but you know. That's my type." She snorted. "One time I stopped by, he was too drunk to be a pig. Go figure." She handed over the research. "I'm sorry to hear about John."

"Yeah, yeah. I'm sorry no one told you. I should have called." He blew out a breath, his eyes on the folder.

"Pardon me, but why?" Sam cut in. He looked so mad. "You knew our dad but why are you on the short list?"

"John and I were close. He got me started." She didn't know how to explain what John was to her, especially since Sam had apparently missed the whole thing. "Saved my life. Taught me about the dark things. Then I cut out and struck out on my own. Been doing it ever since."

"Saved you?"

Dean cleared his throat but his eyes were on his shoes. "Dad saved her from… Pixies."

"Pixies?" Sam laughed and looked between them. "Tinkerbells?"

"Not. Tinkerbells." Claire bit out. Green skin and black eyes flashing in her mind. "So much not Tinkerbells." She looked to Dean and she could tell his mind was in the same place. "So, he doesn't know the story, huh?"

"I'll tell him someday." Dean shrugged, his eyes still far away. "You been okay?"

"Caleb… that was hard. Jim… I don't call Bobby much. I uh… was always a little uncomfortable there. Not cause of Bobby… it was just… too soon after the Pixie." Claire shrugged. "He was a good guy."

"Is." Dean corrected.

"Thank God." She breathed. "So many we lost… all at the same time, huh?"

"It was the thing that… killed our Mom." Dean filled in. "But I got it. I got it."

"After John, then."

"Yeah." He nodded.

"And he never talked about me again, huh." She nodded to herself.

"You know how he was about you. I talked him to death about it and he would never say it out right but once… we were spying on Sam." Dean gestured to his brother. "We were spying on him and I got him to say something about you before he mandated we didn't talk about you anymore."

Claire tilted her head and the wet seeped out of her eyes. "Yeah? What did he say?"

"That every time you looked at him… the way you looked at him, he saw you on the ceiling… burning and screaming." He licked his lips and took a breath. "I don't know if you know what that means."

"That's how she died." Claire nodded and breathed. "I always knew but he would never say it." She sniffed back the stupid, stupid wasted tears on that man. When she wiped her nose, her hands moved with her next words. "He was a good man. An asshole but a good man."

Dean laughed. "You signed."

"Happens sometimes still." She smiled at him. "Your dad hated it. Said he had no fuckin' use for it."

"Wait, you… dated our dad?" Sam grinned suddenly.

"For a little while. He was a hard man to love."

The car door slamming got their attention. A little girl approached and hid behind Claire. Dean pointed and Claire reached back to touch her daughter's hair. "She yours? Claire nodded. "She's big. How old?"

"This is Erica." Claire tugged her out from behind her. "She is five. Erica, this is Sam and Dean Winchester. Old friends of Mommy's."

"Hi." Came the little girl's voice."

"Five?" Dean frowned and counted on his fingers. "Uh… Claire?"

"She's not John's." Claire shook her head. So many people had had that thought but she saw Caleb in her daughter every day. "Your dad made himself perfectly clear on that subject. She's Caleb's." She sniffed again. "He got to see her. We were…" Hiding all over the place. "in Kansas City paying respects to my folks and Sebastien when they killed him."

"Sorry. Caleb was my man." Dean tilted his head at the little girl. "At least she looks like you. I'm sorry but Caleb… as a girl?"

"She's got his eyes." Claire reached down and hefted Erica into her arms so they could see her pretty blue eyes. "My temperament and I kind of wish that came from him."

"She's pretty. Just like her mom." Dean leaned over and kissed Claire on the cheek. "We got this. You take her home."

"No… we don't have one." Claire shook her head. "I got used to running around. I think I only sat still through my pregnancy. John's bad habits rubbing off… but I told him… he didn't do such a bad job with his kids. Winchesters are good people." She set the girl down. She ran her hand over the blonde hair sticking up all over. "Back in the car, baby. We'll go in a minute." Erica ran back to the car. Claire looked at Dean for a long moment. "You ever check to see if they were still there?"

"I check all the time. No one else went missing the way we did." Dean gestured over his shoulder. "Sometimes, I still check for that thing on my back."

"I made John take a picture so I could see for myself." She shuddered at those memories of terror. "I still don't do woods."

"Yeah, I hate the friggin' woods." Dean nodded. "And fucking pixies."

"Fucking pixies." She agreed. "I gotta get the kid some pancakes. So… um… thanks for taking the case off my hands. I don't do those…"

"No problem." Dean glanced at the first article. "Did you catch it?"

"Yeah." She backed away. "I did. I found one, let me to it and I made peace." She lied. "A man kills your kid in a hit and run and you wanna kill him and then you find out it was a demon in the driver's seat the whole time… It if t hadn't happened. I wouldn't have been in the woods that day. So then you think… was it fate? Was it supposed to happen this way? I don't do demons anymore. Give me a salt and burn any day. Demons, witches and pixies… I just…"

"I hear you." Dean nodded.

"You boys take care. Maybe we'll see each other again."

"Be safe Claire." Dean called after her.

Claire climbed into the driver's seat and looked back at her baby, in her seat belt and ready to go. "You hungry?"

"Pancakes."

"Yep." Claire watched her in the rearview mirror as she steered them over to a diner. "Those were Daddy's friends, too."

"They knew my daddy?"

"Yeah. They liked him, too. Imagine that." She smiled to herself.

"Do they hunt monsters, too?"

"Yes. And they've been doing it a lot longer than Mommy. Someday, you will too. We'll be a good team, you and me."

"When do I learn?"

"When you're old enough. It's scary stuff, baby." She pulled in and climbed into the backseat to get Erica in some clothes before they climbed out to get at those pancakes. "Want to go tumbling when we hit Michigan?"

"Okay." Erica propped her chin on her hand as she waited for her pancakes.

After they had eaten, Claire drove them out of town. She stopped by a storage unit in Ohio to get some books to study while the laundry tumbled down the street. They sat in a drive in and waited for their shakes. "What do you think about Canada?"

"Where's that?"

"North. Far North."

"I don't know."

"You think we could stick it out in the cold?"

"I don't like the cold."

"It's either Canada or we start going places we've already been." She kissed her face.

"Mommy." Erica took her mother's face in her hands. "I love you."

"I love you, too." Claire breathed out. "Let's get on the road. We'll be in Michigan in no time and then we tumble."

"Tumble!" Erica raised her hands to the roof.

After the New Year, Claire was up late when the phone rang. It was Dean. He sounded drunk. "You okay?"

"No."

"What's wrong?"

"Um… Bobby's gone." Dean sniffed.

"Oh my god."

"He's gone." Dean cleared his throat. "Look… I, uh… shouldn't be doing this but I need to ask you a favor."

"Sure."

"There's a lot of heavy stuff going on. If you've seen the news… you know it's pretty much chaos out there."

"I've heard that it's old… real old." Claire checked on Erica, she was sleeping soundly. Claire took the phone outside.

"It's pre-Old Testament old. Sam and I are in deep. We're targets and it just… keeps getting deeper. There's a woman that I made Sam promise me not to speak of again."

Claire leaned on her car, she had never heard Dean sound like this. "Like father, like son."

"I know. I know. I did a bad thing… for a good reason. She won't remember me if you mention me or even show her a picture. Her and her kid… I was with them for… a year. I… being with me put them in danger and I had… I did what I had to do… but… I need to know that they're going to be okay no matter what happens to me."

"Where are they?"

"Last I saw them, Battle Creek, Michigan."

"That's not far at all. I'm in Tecumseh." Claire nodded. "Dean."

"They were the closest I ever had to having a family of my own. I've got a lot of stories you haven't heard. I've done bad things. Worse things. Sam, too. I just…"

"Okay. Okay. I'll swing through." Claire listened to him breathe. "She was the real deal, huh."

"Yeah. And her kid didn't hate me more than he hates his real dad so… I guess it was pretty real."

"Dean… get some rest."

"Don't know about that."

"You're a good person. We'll miss him."

"I'm… it's deep. I'm not too worried if you don't…"

"No, I got it, Dean. You'd just feel better if someone was looking out for them."

"Yeah."

* * *

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 13

* * *

Claire had a text of their names, a picture that Dean had sent. She packed up Erica and they made the move. It wasn't what Dean had asked for but Claire felt it was time to slow down. Enrolled in school, new place in a nice neighborhood. Then off to look at gymnastics classes. Erica was excited. She bounced and bounced and bounced while Claire studied the board and the times.

"She's cute." A voice called over.

"Thank you." Claire turned and smiled. Object acquired. "Any recommendations?"

"Debbie's got a good class for the little ones and she doesn't get aggressive like Michelle."

"Debbie?" Claire looked to her daughter who nodded. "She just wants to tumble. She doesn't care. Claire Reid."

"Lisa Braedyn." They shook hands. "What about you? You looking for a class?"

"Um… well… I never have her out of my sight."

"First child?"

"Second… but only." She cleared her throat.

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"It's okay. My boy would have been 12 this year. He was gone before she was a thought in my head." Claire shrugged.

"My son is 12. He liked tumbling when he was little like her."

"They grow so fast. I feel like it was yesterday I was scheming of ways to make her come out of my body and now she's running away." Claire pointed as Erica rushed toward some little girls her own age.

"They do that." Lisa cleared her throat. "It's hard to let them out of your sight but you have to take care of yourself. I have a few yoga classes at the same time as Debbie's tumbling class."

"Um… I'm not really a yoga type. I was in the Airforce."

"You're a mom. You're the yoga type. Trust me. It'll clear your head."

"I'll think about it."

"Mom!" The boy rushed into the lobby. "You didn't sign the form for soccer."

"Yes, I did."

"No, you didn't." He handed it and a pen to her.

"This is Ben." Lisa introduced him. "My pre-teen who thinks he's a grown up."

"Nice to meet you." Claire waved at him.

"H-h-hi." Ben froze when he looked at her.

"Bet you get that reaction a lot." Lisa smiled at her while she signed the form and handed it back to Ben. "Stop staring, sweetie. She's way too old for you."

"Oh… He's the nicest fellow to stare at me in a while." Claire started to drift away. "I haven't really been in the game since her father passed."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay. We're fine. It was a long time ago."

"Well, if you're settled, the ladies and I have a night out once a week. We have a long list of babysitters and we hardly ever invite men." Lisa told her.

"Sounds good. I've been a recluse long enough."

"I have to get my class started. Feel free to audit." Lisa steered Ben toward the door. "Go to practice."

Claire got herself entrenched in the community. She took night classes so she could get her teacher certification. She didn't hunt. But she did keep her eyes on the news. Sam and Dean did not seem to be doing well. But watching after the Braeden family kept her focus while she made sure her daughter was safe. That meant that she left Erica with Ben for girl's night. It meant she got set up with all sorts of men by the other girls. It meant yoga every other evening while Erica learned how to wow her class with what she already knew how to do.

She joined the PTA and started a book club. She got an archery class going and Erica was, of course, the star pupil. She put off going to the run range until Erica was seven. They had several lessons in cleaning and putting the guns together first. When Lisa found out, she was upset but then tagged along with Ben one day. She couldn't take her eyes off him. The way he handled the gun while she instructed him. His smart mouth when he was sassing his mother. Lisa cleared her throat. "He just… reminded me of someone."

"He's all his father." Lisa made a face at her.

"No, um… This man. I dated his father and we spent a lot of time together. The more I get to know Ben, the more he reminds me of my friend. Right down to the leather jacket."

Lisa laughed. "You have a thing for bad boys too?"

"Guess I did."

"Erica's dad?"

"Well, I met him in his bad boy phase. Never got the chance to see if he'd grow out of it. Man I dated before him… He'd been a bad boy for 20 years. His kids didn't turn out so bad… but both of them are bad boys, I'd bet. Only met the younger one once." Then her mind reminded her. "He did have a third son, never met that one. Possibly the only one who wasn't a bad boy."

"You're not in touch?"

"No. Aside from the bad break up with their father… we were all travelers for a long while. It's not conducive to running into each other. I just worry."

"How old were these potential stepchildren?" Lisa winced as she caught her finger in her gun.

Claire adjusted her hands for her. "Well, when we were together, the oldest was 25 and the youngest 21… that was before Erica was born. It's been awhile."

"How old are they now?" Lisa shook her head.

"33 and 29."

"They're not much younger than you are."

"I know. I still worry." She took over for Lisa and the gun prep. "This just takes practice."

"I hate guns. I've never owned one before but have you seen the news?"

"Yeah, it's bad out there."

After the lessons, they all went out for ice cream. Erica tumbled everywhere. Ben kept her wrangled to their vicinity. Lisa nodded to them. "Ben likes her. He doesn't usually have time for babies."

"I'll bet if his friends showed up, it'd be a different story. Kids are so fickle." Claire nodded to her kid. "That one can't ever decide what to call her bear. Same bear since she was a baby. Different name every week."

"I wish Ben were still that young. He's getting more and more grown up."

"Caleb always said that he'd allow her to get big but no bigger than age five. He wanted her frozen in time." Claire glanced over at her daughter who was showing Ben how to hold his gun like a pro.

"How old was she when he passed?"

"Three and a half months. She doesn't remember him at all. I have a few pictures but we were kind of whirlwind. I have dozens of pictures of her but hardly any of him. I was such a dope." Claire shook her head. "I've got one really good picture of him holding her. I've got a couple of him from before I met him."

"None of the two of you together?"

"We uh… spent a lot of time in bed."

"Ah. Lucky."

"We were."

"I had a fling like that once. Before Ben. Just… several days spent in bed with the baddest of all my bad boys. I can't even remember his name now but he was something. Most of my friends thought I made the whole thing up."

"Sounds good."

Lisa seemed to drift off while they cleaned up to go home. Claire couldn't reach Dean when she tried. The phone had been disconnected. She called every number she knew, they were all dead ends.

It was at a slumber party. Ben had a bunch of boys over. Erica was whooping them all at some game. Lisa and Claire took a bottle of wine to the kitchen. They talked about their terrible dates the previous weekend and Claire watched Erica terrorize the boys through the doorway. "You look relaxed."

"Thank you." Claire sipped her wine and picked at some cheese on the table. "I really wish things had been different but things are okay."

"What would you change?"

"I wish my Sebastien was still with us but if he hadn't died, I never would have had her."

"Oh?"

"I uh… got myself lost after he passed. That's how I met John. And John is how I met Caleb."

"The mysterious John."

"Nah. He was just the baddest bad boy I ever fell for and he delivered me right into the arms of a man who had been waiting for me to come along."

"How did he die?"

"Which one?"

"Caleb."

"He… it was an intruder. Tied him up and ransacked the place. Killed him when they couldn't find anything." Claire shrugged. "I never got the story about John. He died a few days after Caleb. Different state. Nearest that I've dug up on my own was that there was a car accident and everyone was badly injured."

"That's sad. There are worse ways to go. I suppose." Lisa refilled their glasses.

Claire smiled as Erica leapt atop a dogpile in the living room. "This is the longest we've been still since leaving Nebraska."

"Oh."

"I got in the habit of wandering around. I like Battle Creek."

"Me, too. I can't remember why I left Cicero but this was a good move. Ben is really thriving here and it's a little closer to his dad. They don't really get along but the distance isn't an issue anymore." Lisa looked over at her. "I'm really glad we met. I hardly have any friends anymore. People are so… weird."

"That they are." Claire smiled into her glass. "I get a lot of flack for the guns and training but it's important to me to be safe on my own."

"I get it."

Claire had the kids in the tent with the flaps open. Lisa was putting away the rest of the smores. Lisa was humming a Led Zeppelin song and Ben was providing the basslines. Claire felt the most at home that she ever had. Erica started chattering. "My mommy says that's Uncle John's favorite song and that Uncle Dean's favorite song."

"Led Zeppelin rules." Ben agreed.

"My mommy says that my daddy's favorite song was a bug."

"Beatles." Claire laughed as she gathered their trash.

"Beatles are bugs." Erica made a face at her.

"I'll explain it when we go home tomorrow."

"She's so stinkin' cute. I wish I had a little girl." Lisa sighed.

"What's happening with that George guy?"

"I don't know. He reminds me too much of Ben's dad." Lisa got her bag ready to be slept in. Claire leaned on a log near the kids' tent.

"Whoa!" Ben pointed and scrambled out.

"Mom!" Erica followed him.

Claire looked up and the sky was filled with… "Is there a meteor shower tonight?"

"I don't think so." Lisa got up with the kids to look. "Shouldn't they all be going the same direction?"

"It's so pretty." Erica oohed. "Mom…"

It was beautiful and terrifying. Claire's bones sang as she watched the pinpoints of light fall. So many. She traced the silver blade in her pocket. She walked around the campsite with salt, for the bugs, she laid the iron rods they'd used for the marshmallows by the kids' tent. She had a gun in her bedroll. Whatever this was, she just hoped she was prepared. The kids eventually went back to the tent and fell asleep staring up at the sky. Lisa was asleep soon after but Claire stayed awake through to dawn. She caught a catnap before the others woke up. She dreamed of Caleb and his blue eyes and his arms and that smile. When she woke, the others were getting breakfast together and breaking down camp. She took the pancakes and sausage when offered. Lisa grinned at her. "This was great. Relaxing. We should do it again."

"Yeah." Erica nodded and bounded over, blonde hair bouncing all over.

"We can do this again." Claire nodded and tossed a smile over to Ben who was wolfing down his mother's sausage when she wasn't looking. "Might do some archery practice next time."

"Sweet." Ben nodded to his mom when she took the last bite of her sausage back from his fork.

"Let's get loaded up and back home. I think we all need showers." Claire took a breath and made another promise to the Winchester boys. Whatever happened, she'd be there.

* * *

THE END


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